I haven't felt this useless in years.

Due to both my knees being bone on bone walking, doing much of anything, has become a major task. I have to plan just about every move or action before I can barely walk anymore.

Yesterday I went to the store and wound up leaving in pain. Later on in the day I vacuumed my floors and by the end of the night I was nearly dragging myself upstairs to bed.

Never have I felt so useless in a long time. If I cannot be useful or function I do not see any purpose to continue on. Yes, there is surgery but with surgery there is a lot of recovery time. In that time I will become very useless, more than I am now. I hate that feeling more than anything else. I've worked hard my entire life and to feel and be this way is terrible on me.