I Have Something to Say

Being the person I am people were always surprised when they found out that I'm smart. What people don't know is as a kid reading, writing, & drawing was all I had. My dad used to beat the shit out of me which is tied into some of the reason why we don't talk anymore. I wasn't even allowed out of bed. I went to school, came home, & went straight to bed where all I did the rest of the day was read every book I owned which was everything from Goosebumps & Dr. Suess to textbooks on greek mythology & astrology. If I wasn't reading I was drawing, & I don't mean to brag but til this day I'm an excellent artist & I blame a lot of it on my childhood. If I was caught out of bed I got my ass wooped then I was put in timeout. Timeout for us meant standing facing a wall with both arms straight in the air for hours on end. If I was caught with my hands down (which I often was because it was exhausting) guess what? Another ass wooping, then right back to timeout for twice as long. I think there was only one time I ran from my dad & he chased me until I slipped & I got beat worse for running. I did 12 hours of timeout that day. Imagine holding your hands in the air for 12 hours straight... Yeah it fucking sucked.
After that I never cried anymore. I refused to show any pain no matter how much I was in & because of that I got it worse each time. But I didn't care, at 8 years old I decided nobody was going to ever get the satisfaction of knowing they hurt me. Then I began standing up for all my siblings because I knew I could take it & handle it better than them.
Now that I'm grown people want to question why I could turn violent so quickly, & why I'm so much smarter than your average youth in the hood, or why I'm so overprotective of the people I love. Its a weird combination where I'm from I guess. But thats why. If you don't know now you know