Even the best souls, can be the worst people
I never would have grown into a shaman if I was with him, so I should thank you for that...
He knows EXACTLY how to hit me on a super deep soul level! Some moments live as Giants, preserved forever inside your soul. We only have a handful of them throughout our lives, but that night is definitely one of those moments that stays suspended in time for me... It's amazing how many times since then, I have been brought back to that night. Not just reminded of the night... But fully brought back to the exact thoughts, sounds, feelings, and seeing the first light of the sun come up in the morning as we listened to Erick Morillo mix in that red carpet song "alright". I wish he could know me now... I've grown and changed so much since he last knew me!
I cherish the time we had together... The good and the bad! I wouldn't be who I am and I wouldn't be able to do half the things I can do now, if it weren't for the horrible things he did! I strongly believe that we made the agreement to have the marriage we did, before either of us came into this life, because it gave our souls the ability to learn and grow in exactly the ways we needed... I'm just grateful that his soul loves mine enough to go through the pain of having to hurt me so badly in this lifetime. Even if he doesn't know it...
I truly hope that his soul can find the peace and happiness I know it deserves.
But.... Here, in this lifetime, I need to remember to see him as who his soul is pretending to be... Because that person will never break character. He will never stop using our soul's connection to get what he wants here in this incarnation.
He knows EXACTLY how to hit me on a super deep soul level! Some moments live as Giants, preserved forever inside your soul. We only have a handful of them throughout our lives, but that night is definitely one of those moments that stays suspended in time for me... It's amazing how many times since then, I have been brought back to that night. Not just reminded of the night... But fully brought back to the exact thoughts, sounds, feelings, and seeing the first light of the sun come up in the morning as we listened to Erick Morillo mix in that red carpet song "alright". I wish he could know me now... I've grown and changed so much since he last knew me!
I cherish the time we had together... The good and the bad! I wouldn't be who I am and I wouldn't be able to do half the things I can do now, if it weren't for the horrible things he did! I strongly believe that we made the agreement to have the marriage we did, before either of us came into this life, because it gave our souls the ability to learn and grow in exactly the ways we needed... I'm just grateful that his soul loves mine enough to go through the pain of having to hurt me so badly in this lifetime. Even if he doesn't know it...
I truly hope that his soul can find the peace and happiness I know it deserves.
But.... Here, in this lifetime, I need to remember to see him as who his soul is pretending to be... Because that person will never break character. He will never stop using our soul's connection to get what he wants here in this incarnation.
41-45, F
