I Have Gotten Out of a Bad Relationship
~The Aftermath~... I'm in bandages... I assumed we were immune to a sudden cancellation. But the mutiny in me sabotaged a staged relationship. To the public, we were perfection. But within the heart of us, we were pathetic.
We presented foul deliveries. In exchange for my hardwork, crumbs of love were tossed in reward. In idle time with me, he snuck for new energies to toy. His mannerisms confused me and my efforts, thus provoking my vulnerability even more. He neglected me. He was disrespectful and inconsiderate. He was ruthless with emotion and selfish with affection. Which in turn, only made me more.. Needy.
My dependency grew. I felt alone. He would drag me through tracks of depression and laugh at my response. But he was a hero. He would save me from the cliff he pushed me off. He would nurture me back to euphoria and I would fall in love again. My perspective was bliss. He victimized and cured me.
But the relationship derived from evil roots. He damaged a soft spot of my heart, in which I allowed penetrative entry. He stole my virginity to love and abused his find. He never loved me.. And I still can't swallow this revelation in whole. His actions gave him away. His character was disconnected. With only words, he created a realm of comfort that now is lost to reality. It floats with the garbage of a universe in my mind. He is but a reflection of what not to hold onto.
I ended it. His game is over. I never want to work for little charge again. I want to beautify myself and attract new friendships. I want to repair a shaken up heart. I want to experience the old feeling of happiness. Something I longed for, but was falsely given.
Thank God for my friend though. He is what truly pushes me forward when I am weak. But I need the courage to stay away from my ex on my own. I am Strong but fragile in this state of second thoughts.
Perhaps not a story.. But eh, here you go.
We presented foul deliveries. In exchange for my hardwork, crumbs of love were tossed in reward. In idle time with me, he snuck for new energies to toy. His mannerisms confused me and my efforts, thus provoking my vulnerability even more. He neglected me. He was disrespectful and inconsiderate. He was ruthless with emotion and selfish with affection. Which in turn, only made me more.. Needy.
My dependency grew. I felt alone. He would drag me through tracks of depression and laugh at my response. But he was a hero. He would save me from the cliff he pushed me off. He would nurture me back to euphoria and I would fall in love again. My perspective was bliss. He victimized and cured me.
But the relationship derived from evil roots. He damaged a soft spot of my heart, in which I allowed penetrative entry. He stole my virginity to love and abused his find. He never loved me.. And I still can't swallow this revelation in whole. His actions gave him away. His character was disconnected. With only words, he created a realm of comfort that now is lost to reality. It floats with the garbage of a universe in my mind. He is but a reflection of what not to hold onto.
I ended it. His game is over. I never want to work for little charge again. I want to beautify myself and attract new friendships. I want to repair a shaken up heart. I want to experience the old feeling of happiness. Something I longed for, but was falsely given.
Thank God for my friend though. He is what truly pushes me forward when I am weak. But I need the courage to stay away from my ex on my own. I am Strong but fragile in this state of second thoughts.
Perhaps not a story.. But eh, here you go.
22-25, F
