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I Will Not Gossip About Myself Or Others

I don't understand people who tell you things about people you don't even know. I had a conversation earlier today and apparently Jenny's mother's dog-walker's cousin's friend might be getting married next year. Aside from the fact I have no idea who this person is, the wedding wasn't even definite and is still a "might".

I should only be told stuff when I actually know the people involved AND it's weird, like the groom will be wearing a papier mache elephant head throughout the ceremony and will trumpet loudly instead of kissing the bride.
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SW-User
I want to go to THAT wedding - with the paper mache elephant head wearing guy... they sound like fun people, and the reception is likely to be a blast. Mothers are good for this. My mother will ask me if I remember so and so - but normally it's depressing news: they have pancreatic cancer, heart attack, there was a TERRIBLE accident. I would rather hear about Jenny's mother's dog-walker's cousins friend getting married... because then you can get on SW and get a rousing agreement that people SERIOUSLY need need classes in making better small talk.

I don't know. I mean... we could always talk about carpentry?