I Can't Stop Feeling So Bad

It is still impossible for me to want to truly believe my friend is gone. I just don’t want to. I know he is but I just can’t wrap my head around it. He tried to save a broken friendship I had with his brother since I’ve known since I was 4. Sadly it was just not working. I now wish I could have made it work and so he could have felt better about it but now it is too late. I’m going to his funeral and I want to say one last thing to him before he is buried. Will this pain truly ever heal? Is there a good way to cope with this? I could really use some help.