I Am Losing Myself
To Stress...
I'm losing it to stress. Today, I knocked things off. I knocked everything off everywhere, because I couldn't see that it was going to happen. I've always been very careful before, and now suddenly I simply couldn't foretell those events.
I never stop. Pausing for breath is something I find hard at the moment. I realised this morning, and picked up a book. Then I read 7 pages and gave up, to go downstairs and throw myself at sorting out my ex's stuff like a whirlwind again. Quite why there's so much to do I don't know, but there is.
I can't remember what was the final straw tonight in the kitchen - it wasn't the knife, but that was close. I simply kept repeating that I couldn't take it anymore. It was horrible!
So, now I'm looking forward to archery next week which might not happen, and hoping I'll see this girl again; and that's about all. Oh and dreading the day the boss gets back and finds everything much the same as it was before he went to get married 3wks ago...
So, losing it. Control, grip, all that. Just want up and away for a while. I thought Tropicana's food offers might do the trick, but realistically I won't get the time off work for ages. Bleurgh, long live weekends away from home so nothing can ever happen at home. After my family holiday I'm staying home for a bit, to sort out life.
Erkles, I just said all that o_O
I'm losing it to stress. Today, I knocked things off. I knocked everything off everywhere, because I couldn't see that it was going to happen. I've always been very careful before, and now suddenly I simply couldn't foretell those events.
I never stop. Pausing for breath is something I find hard at the moment. I realised this morning, and picked up a book. Then I read 7 pages and gave up, to go downstairs and throw myself at sorting out my ex's stuff like a whirlwind again. Quite why there's so much to do I don't know, but there is.
I can't remember what was the final straw tonight in the kitchen - it wasn't the knife, but that was close. I simply kept repeating that I couldn't take it anymore. It was horrible!
So, now I'm looking forward to archery next week which might not happen, and hoping I'll see this girl again; and that's about all. Oh and dreading the day the boss gets back and finds everything much the same as it was before he went to get married 3wks ago...
So, losing it. Control, grip, all that. Just want up and away for a while. I thought Tropicana's food offers might do the trick, but realistically I won't get the time off work for ages. Bleurgh, long live weekends away from home so nothing can ever happen at home. After my family holiday I'm staying home for a bit, to sort out life.
Erkles, I just said all that o_O
36-40, M