I Know the Difference Between Lust and Love
I do - and I don't. My life just got flip-turned, major dramatic stylee. OK so I have a high sex drive. I recently let slip to my new housemates that I'd have sex twice a day if I could - and these are people who .. don't get much. Nor do I, my Mrs being half way around the globe most of the time.
Tensions run between me and the girl housemate, she's drop dead gorgeous and let's face it, my Mrs' figure leaves a little to be desired. She doesn't.. look after herself, and so does not create the longing need that others do for her body.
My housemate would; I would. But, she loves her boyfriend - and I love my Mrs. So we didn't. We had that respect for each other, and our partners - and we kept that in highest regard no matter how drunk or high. I must admit that one night if I had stayed things might have gone differently, but I had to go to work and missed the 'fun'.
But now. A new manager at work, extremely hench, took an interest in her. Singled her out as the hottest girl at work (it's true but she never believed it until I told her, a girl told her - that planted the seed. Then when he pursued her like no other even came close... It changed her perspective on things.
She believed she was attractive and worth a damn both in one fell swoop. Unfortunately this is at the end of a long spell of her boyfriend staying over at the house. They 'slept' separately - he games into the early hours because 'it keeps him sane' (he's anxiety/depression). She works days and studies days too. So I'd be surprised if any action happened even once. He's always "too tired" or...
Well. Today her boyfriend left. And today this manager came over while I was at work. She got scared like a virgin again, she told me. So she did what any girl with her background would do - she got high. Stupidly high, to be precise, and thereby got around the feeling scared and uneasy.
I don't know if her relationship is officially over and they've split up. But the noises that came through the walls just now tell me that .. she's finally figured out what being 19 and smoking hot is all about.
I seriously hope that she will now take some time out to reflect, and sort out her priorities. Her new way of being, her new attitudes. This will change her life completely. I'm excited for her to see where it leads. But as a good friend said last night - just because now you can, does not mean that you should. If he wants you, he's not the only one - and you should choose carefully rather than take the first one to come knocking.
The trouble is now I feel sick. I've come to care about her a great deal, and this guy though he is nice, might be a bit of a man-whore from what he says. I feel great that she finally knows what sex is like (real sex...) and has had it more than once in a day... I hope she gets it so many times she's paralysed a while, someday, too. Great feeling recommend it to anyone.
But, I feel sick because she asked of me, too. She asks so many deep interesting questions about you and genuinely wants to know the answers. She remembers them all. She hasn't destroyed her brain completely yet with liquor, as I probably have (I forget loads of stuff like that). I care about her, I fancy the pants off her, and I also believe I'm too old, wrong time wrong direction wrong wrong. I guess she's just amazing.
But yes she needs that time to reassess. And I will do everything I can to make it happen. Of course she should enjoy the golden days when it's all new and exciting. But not let it become life. Naturally it is her life though, and if that's genuinely the direction she wants to take then I will not stand in her way!!
I just needed to get some of that off my chest really. Thanks for reading :)
Tensions run between me and the girl housemate, she's drop dead gorgeous and let's face it, my Mrs' figure leaves a little to be desired. She doesn't.. look after herself, and so does not create the longing need that others do for her body.
My housemate would; I would. But, she loves her boyfriend - and I love my Mrs. So we didn't. We had that respect for each other, and our partners - and we kept that in highest regard no matter how drunk or high. I must admit that one night if I had stayed things might have gone differently, but I had to go to work and missed the 'fun'.
But now. A new manager at work, extremely hench, took an interest in her. Singled her out as the hottest girl at work (it's true but she never believed it until I told her, a girl told her - that planted the seed. Then when he pursued her like no other even came close... It changed her perspective on things.
She believed she was attractive and worth a damn both in one fell swoop. Unfortunately this is at the end of a long spell of her boyfriend staying over at the house. They 'slept' separately - he games into the early hours because 'it keeps him sane' (he's anxiety/depression). She works days and studies days too. So I'd be surprised if any action happened even once. He's always "too tired" or...
Well. Today her boyfriend left. And today this manager came over while I was at work. She got scared like a virgin again, she told me. So she did what any girl with her background would do - she got high. Stupidly high, to be precise, and thereby got around the feeling scared and uneasy.
I don't know if her relationship is officially over and they've split up. But the noises that came through the walls just now tell me that .. she's finally figured out what being 19 and smoking hot is all about.
I seriously hope that she will now take some time out to reflect, and sort out her priorities. Her new way of being, her new attitudes. This will change her life completely. I'm excited for her to see where it leads. But as a good friend said last night - just because now you can, does not mean that you should. If he wants you, he's not the only one - and you should choose carefully rather than take the first one to come knocking.
The trouble is now I feel sick. I've come to care about her a great deal, and this guy though he is nice, might be a bit of a man-whore from what he says. I feel great that she finally knows what sex is like (real sex...) and has had it more than once in a day... I hope she gets it so many times she's paralysed a while, someday, too. Great feeling recommend it to anyone.
But, I feel sick because she asked of me, too. She asks so many deep interesting questions about you and genuinely wants to know the answers. She remembers them all. She hasn't destroyed her brain completely yet with liquor, as I probably have (I forget loads of stuff like that). I care about her, I fancy the pants off her, and I also believe I'm too old, wrong time wrong direction wrong wrong. I guess she's just amazing.
But yes she needs that time to reassess. And I will do everything I can to make it happen. Of course she should enjoy the golden days when it's all new and exciting. But not let it become life. Naturally it is her life though, and if that's genuinely the direction she wants to take then I will not stand in her way!!
I just needed to get some of that off my chest really. Thanks for reading :)
36-40, M
