I Wish I Could Leave The Past In The Past And Not Look Back
I guess at some point you have to test the waters and see if you have let go completly.
Unfortunately, I haven't. I thought I did. Sure I moved on and I picked up my life again but yet the memories of the past makes me feel upset and it makes me feel like I haven't moved on at all, like my life stood still and I am still that same naive person. Is it guilt? Is it shame? Is it anger that it seems like everyone picked up their life so easily?
I wish I had someone to talk to and listen to me without judging, sometimes I feel like I need to talk about it so I can let go.
Its selfish to think that someone would stop their own life to make me happy, to help me out. Just like I did for you...
Yes, I am upset because it makes me realize that I have invested so much in you and in the end it was a waist of time. Because your thank you comes in hurt and pain that haunts me for the rest of my life. I have to deal with it because I agreed upon it, fully aware of the consequences.
Will it make me stronger in the end, yes it will. Because I was not planning to give up on what I wish to accomplish in life.
Unfortunately, I haven't. I thought I did. Sure I moved on and I picked up my life again but yet the memories of the past makes me feel upset and it makes me feel like I haven't moved on at all, like my life stood still and I am still that same naive person. Is it guilt? Is it shame? Is it anger that it seems like everyone picked up their life so easily?
I wish I had someone to talk to and listen to me without judging, sometimes I feel like I need to talk about it so I can let go.
Its selfish to think that someone would stop their own life to make me happy, to help me out. Just like I did for you...
Yes, I am upset because it makes me realize that I have invested so much in you and in the end it was a waist of time. Because your thank you comes in hurt and pain that haunts me for the rest of my life. I have to deal with it because I agreed upon it, fully aware of the consequences.
Will it make me stronger in the end, yes it will. Because I was not planning to give up on what I wish to accomplish in life.
36-40, M
