Why are cases of people being killed by nerd thighs so rare? :(

I think it's a government cover-up. You know when you hear about an ape escaping from the zoo and killing a bunch of people? That's actually a nerd crushing someone with his thighs!

Ha! Great shades of EP, it's still out there. Good to know some things continue...

"nerd thighs" ...........what are you talking about?
Did you take your meds this morning?

because it's hipsters who ride fixies, not nerds