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I Had An Epiphany

I left a discord channel and thought "maybe I should deactivate my account? Maybe I shouldn't be on here and continue with life." I didn't think people would want me to stay. Few told me to stay because they love my personality. However this 1 guy told me that me staying meant a lot to him. I reminded him of a girl he once knew and mentioned that she was selfless and always wanted the best for others.

On a 1on1 call, he mentioned that I reminded him of an old friend of his. "Lilac" was her name.

The other day, he told me that he came across her photo by accident. He sent me a photo of her. She looked like one of those "scene girls" from Google images. Very attractive. I told him "she looks like a beautiful girl."

He paused and I asked "what's wrong?" He started to blubber and teary. I grew concern and asked "I'm sorry did I say something wrong?..."

He said "no-no.. it is okay. She died in my arms."

Me: I'm so sorry..
My jaw dropped hearing this. You know?

Him: I saw it all happen. She pushed this little girl off the road. There was a truck that was coming. And the truck would not stop. She was so selfless and would think about others. Ultimately, took her own life.

I felt so horrible even thinking about leaving. I had an epiphany of how much I mattered as a friend to others.

It makes me teary hearing his broken voice over the phone. I did breathing exercises with him. He told me to stay because it means a lot to him.

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I Had An Epiphany
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