I Hate Love,it Hurts Too Much Sometimes
"[b]Helloo[/b]" saids the incoming text message and my heart drops a bit when I see who it's from. I haven't spoken or thought about him in weeks and a sad feeling starts to cloud my mind. [i]What does he want?[/i] I thought.
"[b]How are you[/b]?" saids the follow-up text. [i]Bad! After you stood me up..[/i] I though, which was true but I didn't dare to say that. Even though he hurt me a lot I care deeply for him, so I replied by saying that I am okay and asked him how he's been doing.
After a few messages telling me how tired he is (he always is tired) and I started to get annoyed of the small talk. He texted "[b]I miss you[/b]"
It took me a while to reply to that because I wasn't sure if I wanted to throw away my phone or that I found it sweet that he is missing me.
[i]If you missed me why haven't I heard from you in weeks?[/i] I thought. But the truth is that I missed him too and I was heartbroken when he cancelled our last date and never bothered to let me know how he was doing. I wanted to hate him but instead I blamed myself, thinking that I haven't tried enough. Even went as far as thinking I was boring or unattractive.
"[b]I feel guilty that I had to cancell our last date[/b]" he sent. I still felt sad but I forgave him and told him not to feel guilty. I am not sure what to do now, I did all I could to forget about him and now that he starts talking to me and my heart doesn't know what it wants. Do I still trust him? Do I want to continue where we left off? I do like him a lot.
I figured that I should just calm down and take it slow. Try not to worry so much and just have fun. Unfortunatey he's not much of a talker while I am, so communicating often goes a bit difficult specially when he has to talk about himself. I do keep it in mind and be as understanding as possible but how long can I keep doing that?
We'll see how this ends.
"[b]How are you[/b]?" saids the follow-up text. [i]Bad! After you stood me up..[/i] I though, which was true but I didn't dare to say that. Even though he hurt me a lot I care deeply for him, so I replied by saying that I am okay and asked him how he's been doing.
After a few messages telling me how tired he is (he always is tired) and I started to get annoyed of the small talk. He texted "[b]I miss you[/b]"
It took me a while to reply to that because I wasn't sure if I wanted to throw away my phone or that I found it sweet that he is missing me.
[i]If you missed me why haven't I heard from you in weeks?[/i] I thought. But the truth is that I missed him too and I was heartbroken when he cancelled our last date and never bothered to let me know how he was doing. I wanted to hate him but instead I blamed myself, thinking that I haven't tried enough. Even went as far as thinking I was boring or unattractive.
"[b]I feel guilty that I had to cancell our last date[/b]" he sent. I still felt sad but I forgave him and told him not to feel guilty. I am not sure what to do now, I did all I could to forget about him and now that he starts talking to me and my heart doesn't know what it wants. Do I still trust him? Do I want to continue where we left off? I do like him a lot.
I figured that I should just calm down and take it slow. Try not to worry so much and just have fun. Unfortunatey he's not much of a talker while I am, so communicating often goes a bit difficult specially when he has to talk about himself. I do keep it in mind and be as understanding as possible but how long can I keep doing that?
We'll see how this ends.
