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I couldn't sleep. My mind is running in circles thinking the damnest things so I thought I'd share one of the questions keeping me awake.

If you knew your kindness, gentleness &/or compassion was the reason some people felt they could treat you poorly, ghost you,then show up again and again out of the blue to get their own needs met without a thought for yours, would you do whatever it took to completely delete those qualities from your personality completely? Is it worth that to make sure people know up front not to mistake you for a door mat? What's the answer? Just this past weekend. Another, out of the blue, who left without a word several years ago. Thinks I'm always going to be here to use until he gets bored. Idiot.
SW-User
No. I would just not allow them to do it. After a while, you recognize patterns of behavior in people.
SW-User
@Tomorrow it came late once. After that, I paid better attention
SW-User
@SW-User There ya go! ❤️
Tomorrow · 56-60, F
@SW-User I do as well.
Nanori · F
I think you should just learn to not spray your kindness on everyone, 1st see who's worth it.
and if i see someone like that, I just keep my distance.
SW-User
@Nanori I’ve learned that the hard way...
Tomorrow · 56-60, F
@SW-User As have I.
ButterRobot · 51-55, M
No..I wouldn’t delete those qualities. Just accept that it’s the price you pay for being a nice, kind person.
Tomorrow · 56-60, F
@ButterRobot That gets old after a while. The price is too high.
I don't know you but based on your words here and a couple of other posts, I'd say don't change a thing about the way you present yourself. Just be a little stronger when those that hurt or disappointed you in the past try to return. Be selective in who you let into your space...your heart...your soul. It's easy to be enchanted by someone's interest but you have every right to be selective. 🤗
Tomorrow · 56-60, F
@FigNewton Thank you.
@Tomorrow You're welcome...and sorry for my typo. I originally wrote "I'm hoping for a chance in your trend..." rather than "...change in your trend." I didn't mean to make it sound like I was the answer to your judgement of character....lol. (blushing embarrassment)
Tomorrow · 56-60, F
@FigNewtonLol. I didn't give it a thought. I knew what you meant. :)
SW-User
I would delete them from my life. I have zero tolerance these days for games .
Tomorrow · 56-60, F
@SW-User I thought I had done that the last few times. But they continue to show up unannounced. Probably after this last reception it will be the last time.
SW-User
@Tomorrow It seems to be a recurring factor online. Be strong! ❤️
Tomorrow · 56-60, F
@SW-User This last one was some one I had known since college. Can't even use the online excuse.🤷
DeWayfarer · 61-69, M
Hasn't happened to me yet. If I or they brake ties it's usually the last time I see them.
Tomorrow · 56-60, F
@DeWayfarer It isn't pleasant to be thought so little of.
DeWayfarer · 61-69, M
@Tomorrow No it isn't. :( Had too many friends just never tired to contact me.
lubovont · 70-79, M
You hit a nerve with this one. I know the "right" answer... but difficult to do. For me, anyway.
Tomorrow · 56-60, F
@lubovont Yeah. There's no good answer for me.
RubySoo · 56-60, F
Those qualities are wonderful to have. Keep being you......but protect yourself.x
Valentine · M
Your values, not theirs. 🤗
No, because I know some people appreciate and respect those qualities in others, as I do. I’d definitely be more careful with whom I shared those qualities, and I wouldn’t continue to waste them on those who weren’t appreciative. [b]That’s[/b] all that I would change.
Tomorrow · 56-60, F
@bijouxbroussard It just gets old after a while. But you're right.

 
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