Is this a good enough letter?
This is addressed to the girl I like, she hasn't spoke to me in a long time and she found another boyfriend. I want to tell her the things I was afraid to before. Do you think this letter is written well enough, and is there anything you think I should add or take away?
The letter:
" Sorry to disturb you, I know we haven't been in contact for a while but I feel the need to vent a few things. I know I'm not easily understood, and it's natural for someone with all you been through would be afraid of something like me. I just want to clear any negativity between us if we can, or if things must come to an end I feel it is better that both parties know that things have been ended. As I am not very well at representing myself I asked my long-time friend Nick to help try to convey what I mean, and what I feel. If you don't feel comfortable representing yourself I'd encourage you to add someone to the group who can speak on your behalf as well. Nick suffers from anxiety as well so he knows better than I do what you are going through, and how to help you. For a long time now I feel like I have been more of a burden, and a hindrance to you than an asset. For that I am sorry, and if there is anything I can do to repair any damage I have done I am willing to make it up to you. Whatever it is you wish I am dedicated to making things right.
Truth be told I know that I am incapable of being loved, I knew this for as long as I can remember. Maybe I don't even deserve to ever be loved, at this time I don't know for sure. I just feel so worthless, like I have nothing to offer to anyone and all I want to do is prove my worth to you. Part of the reason I like you so much is because you made me feel like I was worth something. That I had value to you, you didn't treat me as someone to be used or thrown away like all other girls I liked before had. You're a great person, and if it weren't for you I wouldn't have opened myself up to people the way I have now. Your one of the strongest, and brightest people I ever met. No matter how low your low points are you still see light at the end of the tunnel and keep moving forward, and I admire that greatly. You really do care about how other people feel, and it is amazing how far you'd go for someone and how far you'll go to forgive. Your more driven, hard working, and kind than most people I've ever met. It inspires me to be better, and do better than I was doing. Thank you for shaking me out of the nihilistic mentality I was in for years. I don't think I ever said that to you.
The reason I can't just move on and find someone else is because I'm scared. I'm afraid no one else is out there, and I'd be forced to admit that I am entirely worthless and no one will ever love me. I just don't want to be alone forever. I know the way I've been messaging has bothered you, I asked you many times if I was messaging you too much and you said it was fine. The reason why I message as often as I do is because I don't want you to forget that I exist. I was afraid that without hearing from me every so often you'd forget how much I care about you. I try to limit myself because I don't want to come off as clingy, or a burden. I hope we can still be friends in some capacity, although I understand if you don't want to hear from me again. For all I know you could see me as some kind of horrible monster, although I keep hoping deep down on some level you understand I am not a bad guy even if I am misguided or an annoyance. I would like to encourage you to share anything you ever wanted to tell me but were too afraid to. I'm sure there is much you want to get off your chest as well, but don't know how to say it. You deserve all the love and the happiness in the world, and if I don't hear from you again promise me to keep on smiling. You make the world a brighter place when you smile."
The letter:
" Sorry to disturb you, I know we haven't been in contact for a while but I feel the need to vent a few things. I know I'm not easily understood, and it's natural for someone with all you been through would be afraid of something like me. I just want to clear any negativity between us if we can, or if things must come to an end I feel it is better that both parties know that things have been ended. As I am not very well at representing myself I asked my long-time friend Nick to help try to convey what I mean, and what I feel. If you don't feel comfortable representing yourself I'd encourage you to add someone to the group who can speak on your behalf as well. Nick suffers from anxiety as well so he knows better than I do what you are going through, and how to help you. For a long time now I feel like I have been more of a burden, and a hindrance to you than an asset. For that I am sorry, and if there is anything I can do to repair any damage I have done I am willing to make it up to you. Whatever it is you wish I am dedicated to making things right.
Truth be told I know that I am incapable of being loved, I knew this for as long as I can remember. Maybe I don't even deserve to ever be loved, at this time I don't know for sure. I just feel so worthless, like I have nothing to offer to anyone and all I want to do is prove my worth to you. Part of the reason I like you so much is because you made me feel like I was worth something. That I had value to you, you didn't treat me as someone to be used or thrown away like all other girls I liked before had. You're a great person, and if it weren't for you I wouldn't have opened myself up to people the way I have now. Your one of the strongest, and brightest people I ever met. No matter how low your low points are you still see light at the end of the tunnel and keep moving forward, and I admire that greatly. You really do care about how other people feel, and it is amazing how far you'd go for someone and how far you'll go to forgive. Your more driven, hard working, and kind than most people I've ever met. It inspires me to be better, and do better than I was doing. Thank you for shaking me out of the nihilistic mentality I was in for years. I don't think I ever said that to you.
The reason I can't just move on and find someone else is because I'm scared. I'm afraid no one else is out there, and I'd be forced to admit that I am entirely worthless and no one will ever love me. I just don't want to be alone forever. I know the way I've been messaging has bothered you, I asked you many times if I was messaging you too much and you said it was fine. The reason why I message as often as I do is because I don't want you to forget that I exist. I was afraid that without hearing from me every so often you'd forget how much I care about you. I try to limit myself because I don't want to come off as clingy, or a burden. I hope we can still be friends in some capacity, although I understand if you don't want to hear from me again. For all I know you could see me as some kind of horrible monster, although I keep hoping deep down on some level you understand I am not a bad guy even if I am misguided or an annoyance. I would like to encourage you to share anything you ever wanted to tell me but were too afraid to. I'm sure there is much you want to get off your chest as well, but don't know how to say it. You deserve all the love and the happiness in the world, and if I don't hear from you again promise me to keep on smiling. You make the world a brighter place when you smile."
31-35, M
