I Think Im Moving On Finally

I never know where to start or what to talk about when it comes to this type of things....but what's on my mind tonight is this huge change I'm about to create in my life and its scary. scary in the sense of the unknown. but then think about how I live not knowing many things every single day. so this decision is I'm leaving my boyfriend who I have known for 3 years now and have been living together for 2 years. he truly is a good guy with good intentions but when I literally feel inside my bones that this man does not trust me and is just waiting for me to leave, then its time to go. there are so many factors that lead to me staying this long as I really don't have any where to go cuz I cant afford rent on my own and then a girl friend of mine that I have known for 5 years becomes homeless and all I want to do is find us a place and move in together. so I have started that search and have told her what I want to do which made it real. I am actually going to leave this man. i have never broken up a relationship when the man is a good man. i just don't love him the way he deserves and he needs to know the truth. he knows I'm "bi". and i put it in quotes because i don't really know what i am. i do know that i do not any longer enjoy dating and being with the male species. as much as i want to bash the male species as a whole i cannot because i know in my heart that not all men are as mean and selfish as the men ive been with. not sure where else i was going as i was just called by the man I'm leaving (he doesn't know yet) who is at work til 930 complaining about how much he hates his job. ive always been an easy laid back person and to live with such a judgmental negative person i cant live with it any more. so i suppose its more then i just don't love him. i really cant stand being around him. well its time to get into auto pilot so i don't start a fight and tell him yet...timing is everything.