I Have Been Pied In The Face

In 1983, when I was 21 years old, I was in a class with a beautiful young woman at a large university. There were nearly 300 people in this class so she had no idea I even existed. I always tried to sit close to her but behind her so she wouldn't know I was looking at her.I managed to learn that her name was Eileen. I knew that she liked to study during lunchtime at a large cafeteria type place. I was sure that she would never go out with me but I wanted to make sure that she would always remember me.I developed a plan.I had a female friend that needed money so I offered her $20 to help me. She agreed. When the day came to execute my plan,I went to the place where Eileen was studying alone at a small table. I was very nervous but determined. I approached her and asked if I could sit at her table for a short time because I was supposed to meet someone soon and I could see both entrances from her table. Eileen looked at her watch and said that it was okay. I sat down.I chatted on and off with her for about 5 minutes. I couldn't believe I was really talking to her. Then, my friend entered holding a paper bag with handles. She looked at her watch then around the room. There must have been over 100 people in this room. She saw me and walked up to us. She looked at me and said, "Excuse me,but is your name ---?" I said, Yes,it is. She said,"Good,I have something for you." She put the bag on the floor and reached into it. I took a quick glance at Eileen,who was watching with interest. My friend stood up holding a large frosting pie(A pie crust filled with white frosting). She placed her right hand behind my head for support and then firmly smushed the frosting pie into my face with her left hand as Eileen looked on in stunned disbelief!! She massaged the pie around in my face for a few seconds then removed the empty tin from my face and walked away laughing.I looked at Eileen but I couldn't see her through the thick gooey mass of frosting and pie crust.I tried to speak but I couldn't.98% of the pie was stuck to my face.People from all around the room were staring at me.Some felt sorry for me but most were laughing at me.I didn't care. I heard Eileen ask me if I was alright? I gave a thumbs up. She asked me if I could breathe? Another thumbs up. My plan ended up working perfectly! If I couldn't date Eileen,at least I had made sure that she would never forget me for the rest of her life!