I See Dead People

I hear them, actually. I get a cold shiver. A shudder. I know they're coming. Usually one person. Usually when thoughts drift that way. I go cold, like mentally disconnected cold. That's when they come into me. They speak, to me or through my physical self to someone else.

It came on tonight. That shudder.

I pushed away. I forced the door closed.

I went to see two mediums once, to find out from people who really know what it's all about. What they do when that cold disconnected feeling takes them. How they reconnect with the world we live in - that cold lasts for days with me.

But sadly I found nothing. Two people mostly acting. Vague ideas that there may be people around. I felt nothing. That's a lie. I felt very little. A tremor, maybe. But no shudder. I guess they just weren't talking to me, so my body and mind did not respond.

Can anyone enlighten me? How do you feel ok again after? How do you feel about dead people using you like that? Should I be scared for my future wellbeing?

So many questions, I wish someone here could answer......