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I Had A Scary Experience

Being on the internet can have it’s scary moments. I am sure most of us realize that people aren’t always who they say they are and that it is imperative that we protect ourselves. I pride myself on being a good judge of character and for having a good BS radar due to the line of work I am in. I get lied to a lot.

Every once in awhile, something scary happens and believe me, I have had quite a few incidences. I guess some people equate kindness with stupidity. A very big mistake on their part. I am NOT stupid by any stretch of the imagination.
I am writing this story in the hopes that it helps you to be safe by listening to your gut and the clues that wackadoos give you.

I met a gentleman here a few years ago. He happened to be from near my hometown. Nice enough. He was going through a divorce and some red flags popped up. He told me his wife made him quit his job (hmmm?) and that he needed an escort to enter his house (i.e. police). He wanted my picture…not happening. Then he disappeared for a few months.

When he returned, his opening line was: I have chosen you as one of my 6 potential life partners. Oh, really now. I am not sure where I was in his decision making process, but I assure you, I don’t have a list and if I did, he was not on it.

He asked if he could come to my home (no and hell no) and demanded a picture. The more insistent he became, the more I dug my heels in. A month or so later, I posted an older face pic and he was very upset that I shared it with everyone before him. Are you getting the picture? Wait, it gets worse, much worse.

He moved down to number 2 on his list and headed west. This poor lady thought he loved her. He was the second man she had slept with. It did not turn out well. I got this message from him stating: “ok, ladies, you can go after her now” (WTH????) Another BIG red flag.

One morning, I was online and I received a chat from him. That was unusual. His opening line was “I know who you are”. Excuse me? I know who you are. Prove it, I said and he did. He had a databa<x>se he used to check out potential renters. (my info has since been removed from this databa<x>se).

He verified my identity by using my daughter’s obituary. Yes, that is right. My daughter’s obituary. I can’t print what I said to him. His response was that I OWED him since I did not give him a picture and that he had the RIGHT to know who he was talking to.

It takes a lot to get me riled up. I have a very slow fuse, but there are a couple of hot buttons and he hit them all. He just didn’t get why I was upset. He asked me if he could “send” a character witness to vouch for him…..well, I think his character spoke for itself.

I got a message from his closest lady friend on here. She took my side and let him have it. She also verified that while he disappeared, he had had some kind of mental breakdown. (as a side note, she also stabbed me in the back over a man)

I am very careful of what I share as far as personal information. Only one of my ep friends has been in my home. Only 5 people know who I am. Please do not ask me for any personal info. I will not give it to you. The more insistent you become, the more protective I become. If you happen to cross the line, I will take action. Period, end of story.
I'm glad you made it okay. That guy sounds really crazy. I hope he's completely away from you now.
akindheart · 61-69, F
@LadyGrace i hope so
DrWatson · 70-79, M
And the scary thing is that this jerk is still out there with his list!
akindheart · 61-69, F
@DrWatson yes!!
Miguel55
I totally can relate to your story yesterday I blocked a girl. Started out the last three months loving me telling me how special a man I was given prayed with me on the phone. And then on Sunday she started using weird things like if you really love me you'll send me money you didn't even send me money for food it and send me money for gas for my car now she's in Dubai. Never asked me for until Sunday and she kept saying come on Mickey if you're the man stand up to the plate. All kinds of intimidation tactics in the meantime pushy I know I'm repeating my story again but for those who didn't hear it I guess said she found another man that she was going to be texting. And she also said that if she were to go to sleep with him she would not tell me. And I said well I thought we were in a committed relationship. Again another termination tactic to try to break me down she wore me hard. I Kaliu Sunday night I did not sleep at all I was so miserable. And I said enough for this enough and I blocked her. Now this is a longer post. But I have a question for you guys. Sorry for the link to the post she sent me some prepaid debit cards with cash supposedly she worked for Chassidy Johnson supposedly my money gram and different ones that are loaded with cash. Not the idea if I was to take pictures and send those cards to her she said she tried to activate them and so they got to be too late and they were turned off or whatever. My question is now that she's not gonna have these cards what should I do with them cash them in throw them away what should I do Chassidy Johnson my money gram and another person I don't even know. Probably they have money on them I would bet. And I am not even sure where to go with that. There was a bunch of lettering material that I can't see in the letters as well. Any suggestions you guys would be appreciated thank you
akindheart · 61-69, F
There is an FBI hotline if they come near you...report them. I had to report a woman who was giving me grief
Afua77
Awful. I have really learned enough to not care, I get a lot of people sending me their number and I turn them down but I get worried about how they feel but I think I don't have to anyway. I am not here for that.
Miguel55
Thank you. Well she says that she's in Dubai or whoever it is. But then again what's true is from reality. Anyway can see that from anywhere. I check the area code and someone Arkansas or Texas. So who knows thank you though I will definitely do that. Hope they have heard the last of them. That would be the best news
hosedsailorboy
I hope you own a pistol or 2, and also hope you shoot regularly. I have taught the fundamentals of shooting a handgun for over 3 yrs in a classroom setting and over 11 yrs to individuals. I also recommend dry fire exercises (this is for many psychological & physical reasons) to get proficient in presenting your gun and acquiring your target. practice a lot to build muscle memory so if a real situation ever happens ("the adrenaline dump" and subsequent loss of fine motor skills) your body acts like it has been practicing and the bad guy doesn't get to tell his side of the story. it's your story and the investigation. I'm very glad you protect yourself, too many ladies (young to old) don't ever think bad people are out there. or that the police will protect them. unfortunately the police arrive to a crime scene and investigate what happened. be safe girl
akindheart · 61-69, F
I have a Ruger 380 LCP. I have not shot it yet but I do have a concealed permit
hosedsailorboy
That's an excellent weapon. I'm going to buy one for each of my girls to shoot. practice dry firing and drawing (always say it or loud (psychological reasons) when you unload it before practicing). Also check this out. the grip will help you (support thumb always points at target & retain the gun if someone were to grab it)
http://www.personaldefensenetwork.com/maximizing-the-combat-grip/
Itsmytime2be
Wow! I had a somewhat similar bad experience here, too. A man I was conversing with over a few weeks, demanded a photo of my top half. I refused, and he started saying I "owed" him this picture, and whatnot! I was livid, and he blocked me, thank goodness. About 6 months later, he started asking me questions again. I immediately blocked him. It's terrible that we have to go through these incidents! I'm glad you didn't go through worse! That's quite scary, creepy, and despicable to use your child's death certificate in that way! Hugs to you my friend
Itsmytime2be
I know! You have been through it! It's just a sad fact that so many people feel that it's ok to be cruel and hateful while hiding behind a screen.
akindheart · 61-69, F
and it doesn't make it any less scary once you realize they have mental issues...whew.
mrfixitman
Just shows a person has to be careful. Losers all of them. I am sorry I have to apologize for the idiots that are my gender.
mrfixitman
Wow, yes your story does show how careful we should all be about information we share. Especially women. It is surprising how much info is available if an individual wants to spend the time and put all these little pieces together. Yes there are some that can be trusted. Just choose your friends wisely cause there are a lot of sickos out there and sadly the internet lets them move into your neighborhood.

I sometimes shudder about all the info some of these younger kids put out there on a regular basis. Be careful. Psycho's are everywhere.
akindheart · 61-69, F
Tell me about it. They are going to need a blood test and some collateral to get close to me.
melbeacher
Drawing blood and looking for the title to my boat.
akindheart · 61-69, F
LOL...I love you to pieces....you will do..
Harley52
This is such a sad thing, isn't it? That trust is something so rare. Real trust is earned. This 'gentleman' is someone to be very afraid of. He doesn't seem to know what 'NO' means. I'm glad you stood up to him and did not let him into your life any further. This place EP started out as a wonderful place to have fun and enjoy yourself. I know that and have met some great people on here (this lady is one of them). But this place has changed. It has become very hostile at times and some of the people in charge seem to enjoy this. This person should not be allowed to continue his harrassment of people. Good for you sweet lady!
akindheart · 61-69, F
Yes it does babe...it is a scary place. I had no intention of taking the relationship any further so when he crossed the line, it was easy to slam the door shut..
lasergraph
The internet is filled with phoneys and frauds. The gather here seeing opportunity of ripe fertile ground. It became a breeding ground especially for those from countries I can't pronounce (Maybe I just have trouble with pronunciation) but there are plenty from the good ole USA as well. Some have agendas, some want someone to bring them here and I am not clear on what the rest want. It leads people to become jaded. The cynic takes over and we put up a protective shell. There are cost as we go into an emotional coma.
akindheart · 61-69, F
yes we do...and my shell is pretty thick right now.
Dreampoet
If I have to pull a gun, god help them. I was trained by a Marine.
MNI1982
Wholly crap!! I swear I would have moved from my home! I had a guy look my info up after he kept insisting I tell him where I live He found my moms address! But not mine thank goodness! No NEVER post a pic of myself on EP and I rarely give out my number to ppl until I am totally comfortable and as familiar as I can be with them I give them my KIK name And last but not least BLOCK BUTTON!! The minute he starts telling me about problems with his wife and escorts he is blocked!
akindheart · 61-69, F
this man found me using very little information. it was just that simple...
MNI1982
So than whatever info you did put out, put out even less from now on! The Internet is a scary place However safe we think we're being I guess we need to be even safer!
akindheart · 61-69, F
yes indeed...i apologize for the delay...just saw this.
TheOldMountianMan
WOW !!! From what you said here this had been going on for while, as you said with flags all over and you kept walking into it. You had some big flags early on, you kept talking with him? Where you trying to see how truly messed up he was or do you enjoy the challenge, excitement of conflict? How does it show your smarts when you walk that long in a sick game like that?
I know you where offering helpful online advice and you did, you also showed the ladies why not to keep talking with lowlife jerks.
akindheart · 61-69, F
Absolutely not. I am nice to everyone until they cross the line. I had absolutely no interest in this man but i was nice to him. It was when he crossed the line by finding me without my permission, is when i reacted.
Believe me, I am very smart....and these red flags did not all happen in one conversation either
Afua77
Wow! You took this person for granted because for the fact that he told you he has chosen you as one of his life potential partner out of six was disrespectful. Who is got time for that? I guess everyone think we are desperate that's why we are on this site. Personally I am not on this site looking for man. I just want to be in a place where I can share what I feel and read others stories and just learn and I believe the same with a lot of us. In the age we live is just unfortunate you can't trust anyone.
akindheart · 61-69, F
No, I did not take this person for granted. AND it had nothing to do with me being on HIS list. I listened and tolerated until he crossed the line. Then I reacted. But true, we can't trust anyone.
LookingForIt987
"I am writing this story in the hopes that it helps you to be safe by listening to your gut and the clues that wackadoos give you." Fortunately for me, that's one of the few important life lessons I learned very early on. I find my gut instinct is almost always spot on, and the few times I've gone against my gut reaction I've regretted it.

Glad to hear you're safe. Just... wow.
akindheart · 61-69, F
here is another even worse story...if you care to read it..

http://www.experienceproject.com/stories/Dated-A-Sociopath/3272774
LookingForIt987
Wow - you seem to have knack for finding the wackadoos! Stay safe!
akindheart · 61-69, F
They find me...
MrSquishy
Oh my....how flattering to know you made it in the top 6! I was caught between laughter and disbelief...Men like him are a reminder to keep your personal details safe.
Odinic
Darn, I wanted to read those stories!
akindheart · 61-69, F
nope. he had a database and he was used to looking up people...he knew what to ask me..
akindheart · 61-69, F
LOL...nope. lesson learned!
DaedricApple
Scary story, thank you for sharing :( I was wondering why didn't you block him after he started being creepy? Did he make multiple accounts to get to you?
DaedricApple
Thanks for answering my re questions, I'll definitely keep your warning in mind
akindheart · 61-69, F
you are very welcome! please stop by anytime.
mor2life3
Good girl... plus you had a chance to learn a little more info.. on his crazy behine.
nicias
Good job, and I'm so glad that sob isn't bothering you anymore. I totally agree with the kindness is not weakness, and people have thought that about me a lot, until I showed them in exact terms how wrong they were.
akindheart · 61-69, F
Good for you. Set boundaries. That is what it is all about. that will keep you safe...
ProgressivelyCurious
Wow! I have never had an experience even remotely like that. It is sad that women are so much more likely to have such experiences at the hands of a man. You are wise to be careful.
akindheart · 61-69, F
I had another even worse experience that I wrote about. You can pick up all kinds of crazies on here
ProgressivelyCurious
Thanks for the cautionary tale. I think I will watch Fatal Attraction once a month just to remind me that the Internet contains all kinds.
HStoner
There are a lot of sick people out there and, I think, that the relative lack of rules on the web encourages them. All I can say is what you already know: be careful out there.
akindheart · 61-69, F
Thank you sweetie. I take care of myself...
MommysGotTats420
Good thing I stole my profile picture off google and I'm actually a 73 year old man! He he he jokes on you stalkers!
akindheart · 61-69, F
you would be surprised the number of men who do that...post women profiles....lol
MommysGotTats420
It's really not that surprising. Women get more attention. And it easier to find men who will flirt with women.
melbeacher
Holy shit that is scary. On the upside that guy makes me look like pretty dam good :)
akindheart · 61-69, F
you are one nice man....
melbeacher
flattery will get you every where with me
akindheart · 61-69, F
and to think you are so close....
philskinky2
Wow, he was a nut case.
I'm glad (hope) nothing physical happened to you; not that "demanding/stalking" is not bad enough on their own.
akindheart · 61-69, F
nope...i am good. i have a pretty good radar for the nut cases...and he was one! i just tried to be nice until he crossed the line.
xCoinx
But why?
Like for what purpose did he go an do all that?
xCoinx
But what made him pick you, like i watched a documentary on ted bunny and all his victims had medium length brown hair parted in the middle.
Is it like that kinda thing where this guy maybe picked you coz you had some feature that brought up his oedipal fixation or something?
akindheart · 61-69, F
I think he thought I had it all together and that I was his type...you never know honey...you just don't know...
xCoinx
I'm a Honey 😝
ginnyginginny
Gotta have your wits about you.... just as walking down the street..... it is almost a new forum for Darwinian evolution.
akindheart · 61-69, F
good analogy...and absolutely
Jim44444
Way too many crazy people in this world. The downside of the information age is the ease of stalking.
akindheart · 61-69, F
And it makes it really bad when you are honest like me.
obsoulete
This is probably the most creepiest story I heard. Hopefully you dont go through this again.
akindheart · 61-69, F
oh but I have...they abound on here like flies.
uncorkyoursoul
How very true and it pays to be cautious and to do homework on others you may come in contact with.
akindheart · 61-69, F
Absolutely!
NikolaTesla1
Wow that's crazy. I hope i never come across these people, what lunatics.
akindheart · 61-69, F
N, they are everywhere...I wrote a few more stories about the incidents I have encountered...scary stuff..
PaladinOH
I am glad you received some red flags on this situation. Stay safe from these weirdos.
akindheart · 61-69, F
I got them right away. I just didn't engage with him yet he wanted to...it was when he crossed the line, is when i worried
Odinic
Wow. Glad I'm an internet loaner. Here's to howling at the digital moon!
Dreampoet
I'm speechless on this one. That's rare for me as you know.
akindheart · 61-69, F
R, you know the problems I had with that woman before this? crazy as a loon
MentallyVibrating
very creepy! hope you got rid of him for good!
akindheart · 61-69, F
He hasn't come near me...but he does have my information...so I am careful.
mor2life3
Good for you.... i know its true, but what a great story... .
akindheart · 61-69, F
Thank you! it is most def true and one of many that i have
jml2000
You have to trust your gut. Your's was right on!
akindheart · 61-69, F
People tell you lots of things. It is up to us to listen and decide what we want to enter our lives. I had already made up my mind about this man and that there would be no meeting. It is when he crossed the line that clinched the deal.
lostinthoughttoo
Holy Cow!!! That is down right scary!
akindheart · 61-69, F
well that is just one of my stories...i have had many episodes of scary while being on the internet..
Tigerbaby2223
O M G... my creep meter just spun out of whack!!!
akindheart · 61-69, F
yes indeed. you have no idea how many occurences I have had of this nature.
sciguy18
A cautionary tale for one and all...
akindheart · 61-69, F
Just one of the many....but yes...we never know who we are dealing with.
yourdaddyrick
boring. dont be so paranoid. lol
akindheart · 61-69, F
if you don't like the story, you don't have to comment...have a nice day.
shoedanglefan
GOOD FOR YOU. A POWERFUL STORY INDEED.
akindheart · 61-69, F
thank you...
SentimentalMood
Yea, you have to be careful online.
akindheart · 61-69, F
That I am....
experienceman11
Be very careful my friend! ;-)
akindheart · 61-69, F
Absolutely....and always
sheernessgolf
Sounds like a plonka!
akindheart · 61-69, F
I don't know what a plonka is, but sure...
sheernessgolf
It's British sorry! Basically an idiot
expressomarkie
Yikes 😓
expressomarkie
More yikes 😓.!!!!!....

Scary stuff...
hosedsailorboy
MANY?????? That just sucks.
akindheart · 61-69, F
Here is another story if you care to read....

http://www.experienceproject.com/stories/Dated-A-Sociopath/3272774
Gyummy
OMFG!!! Always you
akindheart · 61-69, F
I know G...I know...I am a crap magnet for sure.
moonchild0315
akindheart · 61-69, F
Its ok! I am pretty smart now after all I have experienced.
moonchild0315
Well, it knocked some sense into me. So, thank you for sharing.
S74rxed
akindheart · 61-69, F
This is one of many stories I have to tell.
mor2life3
Keep me posted. Great read.....

 
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