I Would Love To Write

Another almost morbid entry. meh, not morbid, just on the not so happy side. I have been listening to music non stop since past three days. I can see why people do that more often. when I am in my usual zone, music is more of noise. Specially when I am working.

now I have been blasting songs at full volume, listening to some on repeat, even when m working. makes my brain work extra to keep away unwanted thoughts.

And the songs I listen make me feel so in sync, with every word describing my situation. Its like the lyricist is going through the same stuff.

I can also finally understand why good muscians are always brooding. Sadness makes you feel a lot closer to music than joy. Music has more impact on a Heavy heart.

I don't know if this stage is good or bad, strange numbness, along with pin pricks of pain. at least I am eating more than last time and no crying all the time... thats always a plus. I would pick Numb robotic behaviour over drama anyday. as long as the dam doesnt burst.. as this too shall pass