I Believe We Can Help Ourselves By Helping Others

As some one who was denied a childhood from abuse and came from a f#cked up family, I know all to well the feeling of cutting others off who care for you, avoiding people out of fear they will do what your abuser did cause why not? You opened yourself up to them and look at what that got you. But worst of all is you end up blaming yourself for everything they did to you. Now that your the one that caused all this sh!t for just trusting a loved one to do just that love you, and do what's best for you? You now the hate girl/woman who looks at you in the mirror cause she took that crap over and over just hoping one day they stop and not walking away or ending it herself sooner.
Soon your best friends become meds, liquor and the constant thought of suicide. Your angry, hurt and just want most for some kind soul to end you cause your too much of a p#ssy to do so yourself.
But what you don't know now and even after it's over you may still struggle with, is your not so bad. Just weird and having no one but people who'd rather waste their lives worrying about everything you do. This is everything from the way you walk, eat, sleep, look, dream and wonder.
I just want you to know it's okay to cry, it's okay to be broken and yes even though it seems no one clicks with you and your just someone not many understand this does not make you a bad person or anyless worthy of love or friendships this just means your different that's all and few will have the joy of experiencing your laughter and view of this world but they'll enjoy you none the less.