I Have Been to Therapy
So I had been going to therapy, today would've been the third day if I didn't ask to leave.. I just feel like it wasn't working.
We'd sit there in silence if I wasn't talking, she didn't even ask me questions to get me to talk.. she expects me to march in that office and pour my life out to her and I can't. I suffer from social anxiety, I have to have engaging conversations to feel comfortable.. and honestly at certain points I felt like I made her uncomfortable when opening up about my sexuality and stuff I remembered doing as a kid.
I started to believe she just wanted the easy money and she was okay with not talking, which pisses me off since I work hard for my money to be wasting it on that bullshit.
But now I feel worse, I remember in the first session when she asked me about the self harming and asked if I had thoughts about doing it anymore, I told her no, but now I do. After leaving that office my whole mood shifted, I felt not cared about.. she just let me walk away and she's supposed to be my therapist? Does that mean she sees nothing wrong with me as well?
We'd sit there in silence if I wasn't talking, she didn't even ask me questions to get me to talk.. she expects me to march in that office and pour my life out to her and I can't. I suffer from social anxiety, I have to have engaging conversations to feel comfortable.. and honestly at certain points I felt like I made her uncomfortable when opening up about my sexuality and stuff I remembered doing as a kid.
I started to believe she just wanted the easy money and she was okay with not talking, which pisses me off since I work hard for my money to be wasting it on that bullshit.
But now I feel worse, I remember in the first session when she asked me about the self harming and asked if I had thoughts about doing it anymore, I told her no, but now I do. After leaving that office my whole mood shifted, I felt not cared about.. she just let me walk away and she's supposed to be my therapist? Does that mean she sees nothing wrong with me as well?
26-30, F
