Only logged in members can reply and interact with the post.
Join SimilarWorlds for FREE »

I In My Own Words

In Memory 1
I miss your brilliance, your mind, your leadership ability. You were the "go to" guy. You were my "go to" guy.

Technology, science, literature, history, medicine, getting things done, leading others, you were a fountain of knowledge—a real alpha male. You could get down and dirty repairing appliances one day and hold top level meetings with scientists, military brass, and government entities, the next. You could talk with the highest on their level (and even surpass their knowledge), and have an engaging conversation with a homeless person on the street, and learn something new. You never stopped learning.

When you picked me up for our first date, you carried a book. I think I said something like, "is the book back-up incase this date is boring?" You told me that you always had a book with you for the "waiting times," and there are many of those.

You started reading before kindergarten, and you never stopped reading since then. Not only were you the most well read person I've ever known (in person), but you soaked up knowledge like a sponge and retained it for decades, just reading it once.

You were a born leader, and most that followed you had great respect and admiration for you. I know because they told me, even before we married.

Now you are gone, and your eulogy was like a resume. That's all. No mention of family, no mention of your brilliant mind, how you handled problems and most often found solutions. No mention of being a father. Your eulogy was a list of dates and accomplishments. They didn't know you, so I'm writing this for you, and I'll write more about who you were, what we went through together because no one knows but you and me, and now there is only me.
This page is a permanent link to the reply below and its nested replies. See all post replies »
SmartKat · 61-69, F
It's so hard. Yes, I do know from personal experience what it's like to see all of a person's wonderful qualities - to love them with all your heart - but also, to be forced to admit that they hurt you and damaged you. PM me if you want.
Carissimi · F
@SmartKat You said it, Kat. Since he died, I try to keep the marriage and the qualities I admired in him in two separate camps.

I never did talk much about him in the negative, but kept it more to how it affected me. I feel that even more so now that he's gone.

I know having gone through it, you understand this.

IMO, he was shortchanged at his funeral. It left me feeling wanting, like most of his life was omitted, as though it never existed. Like he had no family, no life except this resume type eulogy. I'm trying to rectify it in my writing, which is also cathartic for me.