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Tell me a dad joke.
Yes, I actually think they鈥檙e funny. 馃槅
22-25, F
67 replies
Apr 8, 2018
SW User
Can a kangaroo jump higher than a house?
Of course, a house doesn鈥檛 jump at all.
Bushmanoz56-60, M
What do you call a dog with no legs?
[@446022,Bushmanoz] doesn't matter he won't come anyways
Bushmanoz56-60, M
[@446022,Bushmanoz] it doesn't matter what you call it, it won't come anyway
Bushmanoz56-60, M
[@330879,boklenholley7] rude..and that will teach me to type slow
SW User
Why do fish live in salt water?

Because if they lived in pepper water, they'd sneeze.
What did one sock puppet say to the other sock puppet?

Can I give you a hand
Bushmanoz56-60, M
Writing all these down!
Alex161018-21, F
Did you know the first French fries weren't actually cooked in France? They were cooked in Greece
Bushmanoz56-60, M
[@4536,Alex1610] Oh I thought it may have been too deep for you
Alex161018-21, F
[@446022,Bushmanoz] Lol That鈥檚 what she said
Poindexter22-25, F
[@4536,Alex1610] 馃槀
Bushmanoz56-60, M I the only actual dad in here so far?..looks like im in with people who have suffered dad jokes..or as my kids would say "mum!! is being dad again!!"
Alex161018-21, F
[@446022,Bushmanoz] Lol!
Bushmanoz56-60, M
[@4536,Alex1610]'s like a sickness
Alex161018-21, F
[@446022,Bushmanoz] It鈥檚 awesome :D
SW User
Two peanuts walked into the city, one was a salted
SW User
[@4536,Alex1610] corny. My ex-father-in-law told it a lot. First time I was like "what?" because it was so corny. He proceeded to explain a salted get it a salted peanut, assaulted because it was a bad city? "No no I got it, I just said 'what' because it was such a dry joke" oh, I thought you didn't get it? "No no dad, I got it, I wish I didn't hear it" 馃槀
Alex161018-21, F
[@595492,Heartless] Lol! I guess I鈥檓 a fan of corny jokes then. I have nothing to be ashamed of! 馃槅
SW User
[@4536,Alex1610] 馃槉馃槀
Bored23118-21, M
I know more dad expressions than jokes, some that my dad tends to frequent:

1.) Put a fork in me I'm done.

2.) Do you ever look at a menu and say yes?

3.) It was almost good enough to eat! (after we have eaten the dinner)

(for some reason they're all surrounded around food)
Poindexter22-25, F
[@713432,Bored231] Reminds me of my dad鈥檚 favorite. 鈥淗ot stuff comin throw.鈥 (While he carries something hot.)
Bushmanoz56-60, M
Did you hear about the blind woman who got a cheese grater for Christmas?
She said it was the most violent book she'd ever read
Poindexter22-25, F
[@446022,Bushmanoz] Oh no. 馃槅
Bushmanoz56-60, M
[@690452,Poindexter] this is what happens when we are given free reign, but it's much better to just do spontaneous things that embarrass everyone

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