I have been feeling very nervous lately

I’m scared that if I throw myself before a subway train, the train may STOP before it gets a chance to crush me and I’ll get put in the psych ward and diagnosed with schizoaffective disorder again. God must really HATE ME. God DOESN’T love me.

I don’t know if I want to commit suicide, but I feel like it and I feel very lonely. I have nothing. I have no one to talk to. No one to even look at. I’m hurt. I’m so hurt.

My foster mother cussed me out today. She cussed at me for about half an hour. I am very hurt. I just want God to take me, but he won’t.

I just feel so lonely. I’m ugly. I’m unattractive. My features are hideous. I can’t take it. Why won’t God take me?

Should i flag this or are you just venting