I Find People Fascinating
Soo this guy on a social/dating site.. my profile says chat friends only...and when we started chatting I made it clear I wasnt looking for relationship... we became *chat* friends, switched to whatsapp where we've been chatting merrily for weeks... sure he flirted with me.. and made it clear he hoped.... but i never encouraged it and ignored it whenever he did this.. he even said it's a shame that I dont want relationship cos i'd make a great girlfriend..so he KNEW I wasn't offering more..
SO today he starts getting huffy.. says the trouble is that women friendzone him and started ranting that he doesn't need another friend... and that women are shallow..
I tried my best to calm him down and reassure him that i wasnt rejecting him but that i just wasnt looking for a relationship but seems he was determined to have a go... accused me of playing games, of blowing hot and cold and even of flirting with him.. which i didn't ever do! He turned really nasty...very unpleasant...
What was fascinating was how he seemed determined to blame me for everything and he turned real nasty.. and yet the reality is.. i never did anything wrong. I never lied to him, I never promised him anything other than online friendship, i never led him on, i only ever was nice and kind... The truth here is that he heard my words that I am not looking for or offering a relationship but THOUGHT he could change my mind, work on me.. Then when he finally realised he couldn't and I meant what I said - he got mad and threw a tantrum.. and in his *hurt* decided to try to attack me in the hope of hurting me..
What I wonder is... do you think he really believes this and cannot see that if he disrespected my word that I am not looking for more from him then it's HIS own fault that he couldnt change my mind.. or does he really think I was in some way unkind?
Fact is we can't just have a relationship with someone just to be *kind* it doesnt work that way. I never saw him as more than online chat friend... I really couldn't have more with him.. especially as he is too far away.. to that he called me shallow again.. lol but we know what works for us.. and others should accept it..
SO today he starts getting huffy.. says the trouble is that women friendzone him and started ranting that he doesn't need another friend... and that women are shallow..
I tried my best to calm him down and reassure him that i wasnt rejecting him but that i just wasnt looking for a relationship but seems he was determined to have a go... accused me of playing games, of blowing hot and cold and even of flirting with him.. which i didn't ever do! He turned really nasty...very unpleasant...
What was fascinating was how he seemed determined to blame me for everything and he turned real nasty.. and yet the reality is.. i never did anything wrong. I never lied to him, I never promised him anything other than online friendship, i never led him on, i only ever was nice and kind... The truth here is that he heard my words that I am not looking for or offering a relationship but THOUGHT he could change my mind, work on me.. Then when he finally realised he couldn't and I meant what I said - he got mad and threw a tantrum.. and in his *hurt* decided to try to attack me in the hope of hurting me..
What I wonder is... do you think he really believes this and cannot see that if he disrespected my word that I am not looking for more from him then it's HIS own fault that he couldnt change my mind.. or does he really think I was in some way unkind?
Fact is we can't just have a relationship with someone just to be *kind* it doesnt work that way. I never saw him as more than online chat friend... I really couldn't have more with him.. especially as he is too far away.. to that he called me shallow again.. lol but we know what works for us.. and others should accept it..
56-60, F
