I Am Thinking Of Someone
"Destiny or Fate; what was real and what was fake"
I had gone to get a reading from a Spiritual Guidance person before. She told me I would meet with someone with specific physical qualities and traits. She told me that this would be the love of my life, for this life.
At the time, I was ecstatic. My one-and-only? To not be played with or cheated on? Someone that'd treat me with respect and understanding? All I had to do was have faith this person would show up in the time frame the lady told me.
I wish I were lying and said that I met someone the complete opposite but no, I met her (technically online, but she felt it too) and all the physical traits that the psychic lady described, plus the other spiritual and mental qualities were exact as well.
However, the most important part out of it all was that I loved her. She loved me.
Though, because of certain misfortunes and personality quirks from the both of us, it did not last.
Even when we separated, there are days I think about her; how I was able to hold her hand, her laughter, her smile, the way when we would get into an argument but be able to resolute it within an hour later, being compromising and listening to each other's feelings and thoughts.
Figuring things out in my past, I can see why I loved when she admired me for my accomplishments cause my parents hardly did.
Sometimes, when I clear my mind, I get conflicting answers. On certain occasions, my mind and heart say it is better that we split and that I will be with someone who is more suited for a partnership in this Life. On other occasions, I feel that her and I will be together again when we have learned enough about ourselves and connections with others.
It is a inner conflict that I feel will not resolve itself unless I talk to her again (when I am ready) or when I have connected with another in that capacity and more.
I wish I could trust my intuition enough to know which way to go.
I had gone to get a reading from a Spiritual Guidance person before. She told me I would meet with someone with specific physical qualities and traits. She told me that this would be the love of my life, for this life.
At the time, I was ecstatic. My one-and-only? To not be played with or cheated on? Someone that'd treat me with respect and understanding? All I had to do was have faith this person would show up in the time frame the lady told me.
I wish I were lying and said that I met someone the complete opposite but no, I met her (technically online, but she felt it too) and all the physical traits that the psychic lady described, plus the other spiritual and mental qualities were exact as well.
However, the most important part out of it all was that I loved her. She loved me.
Though, because of certain misfortunes and personality quirks from the both of us, it did not last.
Even when we separated, there are days I think about her; how I was able to hold her hand, her laughter, her smile, the way when we would get into an argument but be able to resolute it within an hour later, being compromising and listening to each other's feelings and thoughts.
Figuring things out in my past, I can see why I loved when she admired me for my accomplishments cause my parents hardly did.
Sometimes, when I clear my mind, I get conflicting answers. On certain occasions, my mind and heart say it is better that we split and that I will be with someone who is more suited for a partnership in this Life. On other occasions, I feel that her and I will be together again when we have learned enough about ourselves and connections with others.
It is a inner conflict that I feel will not resolve itself unless I talk to her again (when I am ready) or when I have connected with another in that capacity and more.
I wish I could trust my intuition enough to know which way to go.
36-40, M
