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I Am Confused About My Relationship

I am in my longest relationship ever... The guy is funny, and smart, addicted to cuddling and kisses (totally not a bad thing) but also distant and doesn't know how to support me with my depression, which really forms a big barrier between us because I don't confide in him. He doesn't know what to say when I tell him about how I'm feeling, and then he feels bad he cant't help.
An old friend and I have been catching up, and he has not been able to be with anyone else, even after two years, because he loves me and he's still emotionally attached. I love him too. And I want to help him... he has really bad depression and has been lowkey contemplating suicide. I want to be there for him, like I haven't been before. I feel guilty about it, because I'm having doubts about being with my current boyfriend, but I want to stick it out. I don't want to be squirrely, push people away, or leave him for someone else. I'm his first girlfriend. I don't want to break him. Leave what I am familiar with, but disappointed, for someone who has proven they'll do anything for me? When I am worried about the well beings of both guys?

Please, no hate. I just want to figure this out...

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SW-User

Distant? Anyways, you could always tell him how he "could" handle you. He isn't trying to ignore your moods, seems to want to help you. As someone with many issues, it's better to tell them how they can help you.
But if you really want to leave, then you do what you want. Don't worry about him, worry for yourself. Just make sure you end it with no regrets.
Say what you mean to say, what you need to say, then leave. Make sure he understands it's over. So that way both you and him can move on peacefully. Don't leave feeling bitter or you will regret it.

insidiousisblindinception · 22-25, F

@SW-User My problem is that I haven't forgiven myself from hurting the guy a long time ago. I feel like he could make me happy because he'll put in the effort and he knows that I need constant reassurance, and he gives it. My boyfriend currently always forgets that, and I always fear asking him if everything is okay. I just wanted to see what everyone thought. But we'll see, I guess.

SW-User

@insidiousisblindinception Definitely discuss it with him about the reassurance part.If he understands why you ask certain things or do certain things, then it will make better sense to him.Lol, sorry for rambling.
I hope things go okay for you. :)🤗

insidiousisblindinception · 22-25, F

@SW-User Thank you. : )