I Don't Understand Lies And Gossip
The trouble with being associated with a scandal is that people never, ever forget it. It actually limits your social identity because ever after, you will be known only or at least mainly by the scandal.
It doesn't matter whether the scandal was your fault or someone else's or both. It doesn't matter how long ago it happened. That is now who you are in the eyes of everyone who knows about it. And, believe me, there is nothing you can say or do to change that.
When people gossip about you, and you ask that classic rhetorical question, "Don't they have anything better to do?" the actual answer is that they really don't. Many people perceive their own lives as basically boring. That is why I believe it is better to be open about admitting calmly to the basic facts of your scandal, while not elaborating or talking to anyone about the details. Both secrecy and details tend to fuel the imaginations of bored people and encourage them to talk more.
It doesn't matter whether the scandal was your fault or someone else's or both. It doesn't matter how long ago it happened. That is now who you are in the eyes of everyone who knows about it. And, believe me, there is nothing you can say or do to change that.
When people gossip about you, and you ask that classic rhetorical question, "Don't they have anything better to do?" the actual answer is that they really don't. Many people perceive their own lives as basically boring. That is why I believe it is better to be open about admitting calmly to the basic facts of your scandal, while not elaborating or talking to anyone about the details. Both secrecy and details tend to fuel the imaginations of bored people and encourage them to talk more.
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