I Am Grateful
I am so grateful for friends. I feel blessed that I've been able to accumulate the group of friends that I have. They are so supportive, unique, and inspiring. I learn something from them in every conversation that we have.
I am also grateful for finally learning how to love myself. I was in a recent 'breakup', and in the past, that kind of thing would've broke me. I used to become so self-critical and blame myself for all sorts of things and/or feel like I wasn't good enough. It would lead me to engage in somewhat self=destructive things and regret it later.
Luckily, I was able to listen to my needs, and eventually, I decided to take time to myself... and by time to myself, I mean like 3 years. Sure, there were a couple of flings in there, but nothing serious. I was taking time to get to know myself and to appreciate myself. When I entered something, I was very direct in stating that I was not looking for commitment, because I was focusing on myself.
Looking from the inside, I wasn't sure if I had accomplished much on my self-journey in the last 3 years. I had begun to wonder if I had made any progress at all. Thankfully, this last relationship has finally answered my question.
I had begun to emotionally invest in this relationship, so when the breakup came I was relieved to find that it didn't break me as it had in the past. Sure, I took a day to cry, but the next morning I woke up with a smile. It was instant. Because that morning, I knew that I had not lost a thing. Everything that I needed was still present. I had me, and I appreciated that. It was more than enough.
I went about my day with vigor and excitement because I still have an exciting job and I'm currently working in other areas to improve myself as well. I realized that I didn't have to waste energy and be sad about someone else's decision. I realized that regardless of who I'm with, or who I'm not with, I am still enough. Nothing is changing that. And I am grateful.
I am also grateful for finally learning how to love myself. I was in a recent 'breakup', and in the past, that kind of thing would've broke me. I used to become so self-critical and blame myself for all sorts of things and/or feel like I wasn't good enough. It would lead me to engage in somewhat self=destructive things and regret it later.
Luckily, I was able to listen to my needs, and eventually, I decided to take time to myself... and by time to myself, I mean like 3 years. Sure, there were a couple of flings in there, but nothing serious. I was taking time to get to know myself and to appreciate myself. When I entered something, I was very direct in stating that I was not looking for commitment, because I was focusing on myself.
Looking from the inside, I wasn't sure if I had accomplished much on my self-journey in the last 3 years. I had begun to wonder if I had made any progress at all. Thankfully, this last relationship has finally answered my question.
I had begun to emotionally invest in this relationship, so when the breakup came I was relieved to find that it didn't break me as it had in the past. Sure, I took a day to cry, but the next morning I woke up with a smile. It was instant. Because that morning, I knew that I had not lost a thing. Everything that I needed was still present. I had me, and I appreciated that. It was more than enough.
I went about my day with vigor and excitement because I still have an exciting job and I'm currently working in other areas to improve myself as well. I realized that I didn't have to waste energy and be sad about someone else's decision. I realized that regardless of who I'm with, or who I'm not with, I am still enough. Nothing is changing that. And I am grateful.
31-35, F
