I Hate Traitors

I recently discovered that the tree I have loved so much is a mfing traitor. Go figure. Of course it is!--that's the story of my life. I'm surrounded! Surrounded by fakes. Surrounded by people (and evidently trees) masquerading around as good when they really are EVIL! Evil incarnate, I tell you. Do you know how many times I have researched that tree trying to identify it?? A bunch. Only recently was I able to finally track it down. And guess what? It's an invasive tree in my area! This is like terrible news to me--I can't quit shaking my head. How could I not have known?? (it definitely was not for lack of trying.) Only on my most recent search (for balls on leaves) did I come across it. At first I thought it was something called "galls", but after continuing to search, I found it--it's a Chinese Parasol tree. And evidently it's an invasive--(on the same level as that invasive vine, Kudzu)--which is totally and completely unacceptable to me! I'm too conscientious and responsible for that bs. At first I was thinking it wouldn't be too bad--that I would just bag the leaves up and dispose of them properly. Get them off our lawn.. Well what I failed to realize was that all those little seeds that are stuck on the leaves, dry up and fall off! Mother f-er. So now I'm behind and trying to catch up (which is overwhelming). It's like an Easter egg hunt (in a sauna) gone bad. And I look up and see about a jillion more leaves just waiting to drop. If I had a chainsaw I'd go hack the blasted traitorous tree down right this very moment! I don't give a flying F how much I've admired it and thought it was pretty over all these years. My tolerance for Jeckyl and Hyde types is gone. Kaput. Finito. I've had it. No mercy! I'm freaking sick of having to deal with stuff like this--I'm so over it, it's not even funny. But I care about our environment too much to just ignore it. I could not in good faith just pretend like it's too late--or that I don't know, don't see, don't care. So I'm gonna try my very best to do what I can to prevent that wolf in sheep's clothing tree from spreading it's nasty seeds all over my yard/neighborhood. I've got my work cut out for me--same as I do for all the mfing humans like this in my midst. Honestly at this point, I'd take a chainsaw to them too!(and I don't say that lightly).😡