My time is largely all used up. Torn between working towards a future and relaxation.
There's no rest, really. Brief moments of respite. But, all the work also compounds, and my economic and sociological position continuously increases. I think the sacrifice is worth it. Much better than living in my parent's house, spending most of my time in a 10x10 room. It sometimes felt like a prison, despite my willful engagement in it.
Now, I got this 1800 square foot house with my gf, and it's like, "Holy shit. Is this real?"
At the same time, I've had to put away these things that I love in order to get here. No more anime. No more video games. Shit, hardly even any reading. The most I get is a few minutes here and there.
But. Again, that is the price to pay for freedom, I guess.
Next, I'm considering becoming a soldier. Despite the possibility of making huge money after this well-paid internship. I want the test. I want to maximize my potential in all areas. I don't want to just be a nerd or a warrior. I want to become the greatest version of me I can, on all levels. I want to be the best partner I can be. I'm coming for supremacy-of-self on all levels, every dynamic, every single vector. Spiritual, as well. Maybe I'll become a monk for awhile, after I get done going to war.
There's two things Jocko Willnik says made him feel like a "real" man.
Learning Brazilian Jiu Jitsu--knowing he could take 95% of people in a fight.
And going to war, learning how he handled life and death, seeing the absolute best and the absolute worst of humanity. And willfully putting himself in a tremendously difficult situation. Finding out whether he would break or handle it. I want to find out if I will break or handle it.
Now, I got this 1800 square foot house with my gf, and it's like, "Holy shit. Is this real?"
At the same time, I've had to put away these things that I love in order to get here. No more anime. No more video games. Shit, hardly even any reading. The most I get is a few minutes here and there.
But. Again, that is the price to pay for freedom, I guess.
Next, I'm considering becoming a soldier. Despite the possibility of making huge money after this well-paid internship. I want the test. I want to maximize my potential in all areas. I don't want to just be a nerd or a warrior. I want to become the greatest version of me I can, on all levels. I want to be the best partner I can be. I'm coming for supremacy-of-self on all levels, every dynamic, every single vector. Spiritual, as well. Maybe I'll become a monk for awhile, after I get done going to war.
There's two things Jocko Willnik says made him feel like a "real" man.
Learning Brazilian Jiu Jitsu--knowing he could take 95% of people in a fight.
And going to war, learning how he handled life and death, seeing the absolute best and the absolute worst of humanity. And willfully putting himself in a tremendously difficult situation. Finding out whether he would break or handle it. I want to find out if I will break or handle it.
