Those first words, that you'll learn - those are the ones that count.
All of us can learn how to be better at relationships with ourselves and others. We can heal from abusive and difficult childhoods.
There's plenty of good professional advice online, written by psychologists and based on extensive research and proof.
Try typing Psychology Today and the issue you most want to explore.
It will give you a range of free articles, each written by an experts in that topic.
No one is ever too broken to be beyond healing.
You're welcome to contact me privately about specific issues if you wish.
I can probably recommend a few books that could start you in the right direction.
Self-help groups are also often a very good idea.