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I Don'T Know Where To Put This

[big]I Believe Good Manners Are Important - A Plea for Civility in Political Discourse[/big]

If they ever allow us to start creating new groups, I'm going to create a group called "I Believe Good Manners Are Important." But in the meantime, this will have to do.

I was very fortunate, and pleasantly surprised, to have gotten almost all respectful, if not all completely positive, responses to my last post, in which I said that I support Donald Trump.

But when I responded to an earlier post, in which someone asked if Hillary Clinton would be our first woman President if elected, I got a very nasty response from someone who attacked my femininity. I said that yes, Hillary Clinton would be our first woman President if elected, but that electing a woman president wouldn't be nearly as big an accomplishment as electing a good president who would have our best interests at heart, and someone told me to get a f---ing grip and that I had way too much testosterone, as if I can't really be a woman if I'm not supporting Hillary Clinton. At first, I tried speaking up for myself and informing this person that women do not vote as a block, but then I realized that that was probably exactly what she wanted, and that I didn't need to defend my femininity, especially to some ignorant, foulmouthed kid who knows next to nothing about me. So I ended up blocking her and deleting my response to her.

But I've seen plenty of disrespect from both sides during this election season (though not on my last post, thankfully). I'm always saddened when I see someone refer to Obama as "the ape who occupies the White House," or some other racist comment. This makes Republicans look bad and gives Democrats more ammunition to use against us. Some, though not all, Democrats love to call conservatives racist, and this just gives them more grist to their mill, so to speak.

And Democrats who label all Republicans, especially white Republicans, as racist, sexist, or both, or resort to other personal attacks when someone disagrees with them aren't doing themselves any favors either. Labeling all conservatives racist or sexist is a form of social and political blackmail and needs to stop. I've seen just a little bit of that here, but I haven't spent too much time on this site during the last few months. But I've seen lots of it on youtube, Facebook, and other social media sites and chat rooms. Not only is this very disrespectful, it shows a great deal of ignorance and makes your side look bad too.

This isn't some battle (or war) that can be won by attacking our "enemies" (those on the other side of the political aisle). The only way we can save our country is if we all pull together and work to make this a place where the rights and freedoms of all people are respected. And it all starts with treating each other with kindness and respect.

Divide and conquer seems to be a favorite strategy of some politicians these days. Maybe it has been a strategy longer than I'm aware of, but it seems to be happening more and more lately. As long as they're able to keep blacks and whites, the poor and the rich, Muslims and Christians, and liberals and conservatives at each other's throats, we won't look up and see what they're doing to all of us. Any attack on any group - racial, gender, religious, or socioeconomic - ultimately hurts all of us.

I don't believe in political correctness, but I do believe in respect. I think that political correctness is a lame, counterfeit substitute for genuine respect. I long for the days when people were generally expected to be respectful toward one another, and there was no perceived need for political correctness. Of course, certain words should never be used, such as the "n" word. But if you have genuine respect for others, it will show. And if you don't, that will show too, even if you know all the right words to use.

Maybe things have gotten better on here since I got that nasty response from that girl. Generally, this seems to be a very friendly site and I usually have a very pleasant experience here. But politics has a way of bringing out the worst in people. Actually, now that I've checked out some more political posts on here, I'm afraid that it hasn't gotten much better. :(

I hope that we can all come through this with our friendships intact, including friendships between people who see things differently. True friendship is such a precious thing and isn't so easy to come by. It certainly isn't worth it to throw away a good friendship just to make a political point.

Okay, I'm getting off my soapbox now. Have a great rest of the weekend, everybody.
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Cinnamon · 31-35, F
I hugely appreciate your outlook and all these thoughtful words. The US election campaign and its outcome have left many of us all around the world dismayed. More disturbing than the fears many of us have about Trump is the picture of an American population divided against itself, seemingly living in two hostile solitudes of mutual disdain and incomprehension. This is why I am trying to talk with Trump supporters on here and understand where you guys are coming from. Every time I read thoughtful, reasonable words from a Trump supporter like you, it makes me happy, because it makes me think that we are reasonable people who disagree -- not some kind of implacable enemies who can never even speak to each other.

That said, two points in the interests of better mutual understanding:

1) Accusing Democrats or liberals - even though you did say "some not all" - of labelling all conservatives as racists, seems like exactly the kind of negative generalization that you are asking everyone to stop doing.

2) Rumours, urban legends, and false news have become a huge issue in the recent election campaign and in politics generally. So I'd like to see us all giving sources for statements like your anecdote here about someone finding Republican ballots in someone's garage. By way of comparison, I heard a couple of days ago that scientists are saying the US election was fixed by Russian hackers who messed around with the voting machines and caused Trump to win the swing states. I'd like to believe that, because it would make Trump's presidency illegitimate and plus it's a fascinating story. But I googled it, and quickly found the original story and a follow-up story from a credible source (Scientific American) explaining that there really isn't any solid evidence for this accusation. So I'm not spreading it around.

These are just additional suggestions for smoothing the paths to all of us continuing to talk to each other and even learn from each other, rather than digging ourselves in for years of verbal trench warfare.

Thanks again!
TeresaRudolph71 · 51-55, F
Thank for taking the time to read my post, and for your thoughtful response.

Your points are well taken.

I guess I don’t know how many Democrats label all Republicans as racist and how many don’t. It’s good to see that you apparently don’t. Hopefully most don’t, though the ones who do seem to be making a lot more noise these days. But perhaps there’s a silent majority who are more reasonable but who don’t want to get into a big argument and have a big ugly scene (just as many Republicans don’t).

And yes, we should find and carefully examine the sources for stories like the one that I heard. I must admit, I don’t know who originally said that all those Republicans ballots were found in someone’s garage. I probably should look into that some more before I say anything more about it. And I appreciate that you looked into the story about the Russians hacking into the voting machines. I remember Hillary Clinton saying something about that, at the beginning of the last debate. Of course, my reaction was different because of my different political perspective.

I greatly appreciate your sincere efforts to understand where we’re coming from. That also gives me hope that maybe we can have an honest, rational dialogue about the issues of today. Thanks again.
TeresaRudolph71 · 51-55, F
@Cinnamon I've since decided to edit this post and delete the part about what I heard about the ballots being found in someone's garage. I've been thinking a lot lately about what I've said in various posts, and I want to be very careful about what I say, even if I have my suspicions about certain things.

Thanks again for your thoughtful response.