I Analyze Myself In The Mirror
I looked today. Tonight. Just now. And I saw a skeleton.
In the past I've seen a handsome guy. Or my eyes, filled with the battle against horrible things, dreadful thoughts. Sadness. Filled with hope, sometimes a sparkle.
Tonight I looked. I saw a skeleton. I saw nothing in those eyes. Barely a flicker of life. I felt for a guy at work. A guy who is not exactly bullied maybe, but they say he's bad at his job and are always gutted if he's on their team. He stood up to it one night and I witnessed true courage. Now he's in tears before work each shift, don't know why. I've only seen him a few times before in my life but I know a lot already. Just from those few minutes. I want to reach out to him, and I have a plan to give him this account. On paper. To add me. He must have a support network of sorts, or he would not have spoken back... Surely... If not he's an incredible human being and I would hate to see his life go to waste.
But for me, tonight. I feel very little. I tried to share appreciation for my family tonight. I hugged Mum and Dad goodnight, and it felt good. I've been living at home for 5 months on the trot now, and very seldom have I done that. It's bad. But I tend to come round to these things quite slowly. Often almost too late. I'm working on that. But things have hit me lately, and only now am I seeing who is really there for me. My fiance surprised me by being there truly and deeply. Mum and Dad, my sister.
All that's left is for me to believe again. I tried and failed. Time to try again.
This skeleton is to be reborn, Grimm, I hereby reject thy presence wholeheartedly. LET ME LIVE.
In the past I've seen a handsome guy. Or my eyes, filled with the battle against horrible things, dreadful thoughts. Sadness. Filled with hope, sometimes a sparkle.
Tonight I looked. I saw a skeleton. I saw nothing in those eyes. Barely a flicker of life. I felt for a guy at work. A guy who is not exactly bullied maybe, but they say he's bad at his job and are always gutted if he's on their team. He stood up to it one night and I witnessed true courage. Now he's in tears before work each shift, don't know why. I've only seen him a few times before in my life but I know a lot already. Just from those few minutes. I want to reach out to him, and I have a plan to give him this account. On paper. To add me. He must have a support network of sorts, or he would not have spoken back... Surely... If not he's an incredible human being and I would hate to see his life go to waste.
But for me, tonight. I feel very little. I tried to share appreciation for my family tonight. I hugged Mum and Dad goodnight, and it felt good. I've been living at home for 5 months on the trot now, and very seldom have I done that. It's bad. But I tend to come round to these things quite slowly. Often almost too late. I'm working on that. But things have hit me lately, and only now am I seeing who is really there for me. My fiance surprised me by being there truly and deeply. Mum and Dad, my sister.
All that's left is for me to believe again. I tried and failed. Time to try again.
This skeleton is to be reborn, Grimm, I hereby reject thy presence wholeheartedly. LET ME LIVE.
36-40, M