watch for wet pants and puddles on the floor

warning: will devour you

Slippery when wet

I need this on my front door

Don't feed after midnight...really... don't...

Warning: Exposure can result in loss of sanity and higher brain functions.

Caution: certified sarcasm trainer...engage at your own risk.

The 😈 made me do it !

a giant FRAGILE, HANDLE WITH CARE sticker.

Open with care 🤔

Stay 500’ Away

Keep your distance. I'm grabby and I don't smell so good.

WARNING: Intense and Racing mind

Keep in a cool dark place.

Brain inserted upside down. No soul 🤦‍♂️

may cause erections lasting longer than 4 hours

I choose or you lose.

WARNING: I check out breasts and bulges. I look both ways.

Undiagnosably Bipolar

Same, I guess.

Don't play stupid with me. I'm better at it than you.

May contain traces of asshole.

Do not touch it bites