Can you name something?

I've always thought "Chlamydia" was a beautiful name. Syphilis sounds like a Greek heroic protagonist in some ancient epic myth. I think Chlamydia and Syphilis should hook up! If they could just shake that STD stigma.....................Hells bells! Come to think of it, all the STD's sound like Greek icons or realms.
"List thine ears to me young men of Athens, and I will tell the bitter sweet tale, of the beautiful sweet Chlamydia and noble Syphilis who dwelt long ago in the Kingdom of Gonorrhea......."
Why didn't they give STD's ugly scary names? Like "Snottymuff" or "Sptundick"? It's a mad mad world I tell ya!