As a single parent and sole guardian, everything falls on my shoulders. I have zero emotional support in my life. I've got to hold it all together if we are to survive.

lifetime of dealing with family, it would have been so nice to have had a good family even in the adult years. I feel like a huge part of my life is missing because of it and at the same time refuse to deal with them any longer due to adrenal problems, and live in close proximity to two siblings.

That's a really good question. Thanks for posing.

In my case I think it would have to be being pig-headed, like I know in my heart and mind that this is the right thing to do but I go ahead and go a different direction anyway because, I really don't know. The closest would be because I know I can still afford it (to make a mistake).

The whole being alive thing.

pessimism mostly

Acceptance.

Speaking.

It's a secret.

Being me

Being humble ;-)

you don't feel much