I can count to 100

*comes at you with a hair spray can and a lighter, with a partially scrubbed off drawn mustache in permanent marker*

Speak

I can type in English using only a touch screen phone connected to the internet.

kinda bendy which freaks my family out

I can juggle cat food in my mouth

Fart your name!

Read minds. 🙂

Curl up inside my shell and dissappear to the world

Not give a shit