How does your mother stay so young looking?

She bathes in unicorn blood

@faefairy: Yeah...she was formulaic.

If "Unzip Fly"
then "Reach in fly"
Else "take off blouse"
If else "remove shoe"
End

A bit too programmed.

Yeah. She goes by the name "my girlfriend" now.

So she's not actually dating me. That's just her name.