People of the United States! Do not despair, though all might seem lost!Though the forces of Gangleslotte run rampant in the government in the wake of an election tainted by troll magic, there is hope! Our Lord Farblesnozz has never turned his back on those who are truly faithful, and He will reserve a place for us in... See More »
This morning, I ran afoul of one of the servants of Mayor Gangleslotte!The foul fiend had the audacity to knock at my door at 8:00 in the morning! I answered the door in my ceremonial Farblesnozzian garb, in order to invite questions. This is a strategy I use to deconvert those who have been deceived by the trolls of... See More »
Beware those who proclaim false religions, calling others "sinners" in order to take away their rights!Those people will toil in the dirt mines for eternity! For so it is written in the Holy and Perfect Gliberoo, in the book of Gribblefritz, Chapters 4-5: (Quote)
It has come to my attention that one of the trolls in the employee of Mayor Gangleslotte is spamming the good people of Similar Worlds.This is a classic tactic of the trolls in the employ of the Evil One! For he knows the wisdom of what is written in the Holy and Perfect Gliberoo, in the book of Ssatrams, chapter 1, verse 7: 7. A truth, repeated once, with evidence, is better than... See More »
Fellow children of Farblesnozz, the threat to our very way of life is all too real!The forces of Mayor Gangleslotte are gathering for the final battle against our beloved creator. It is written in the book of Orbdamu, chapter 6, verses 61-66: 61. And Gangleslotte will send his army of trоӏӏs over the entire world, battling the tr... See More »
Ryan Walters has enraged our Lord Farblesnozz with his blasphemy!For it is written in the Holy and Perfect Gliberoo that Yahweh is a false god invented by the wicked and corrupt Gangleslotte to lead humans astray from their true Creator! Woe to Ryan Walters, who will toil in the dirt mines of Schmickleton for... See More »
Why do you still resist Farblesnozz's love?All He wants to do is love you! Why can you not simply submit?
Fellow children of Farblesnozz, hear me! We must resist the forces of Gangleslotte!Hear the wisdom written by our Lord Farblesnozz in the Holy and Perfect Gliberoo! Suoivbo 6:66-69: 66. For Gangleslotte has plotted against humanity, using his guise of Yahweh to sow racial discord. 67. He has written in the foul abomination called... See More »
Ye doubters and scoffers, know ye not that Farblesnozz warned us of your hate?Lacisnesnon 1:1-5 1. Ye workers of iniquity, who claim that there is no Farblesnozz, where is your proof? 2. It cannot be the air, for he hath created it! 3. It cannot be the dirt, before he hath created it! 4. It cannot be the trees, for they... See More »
My brothers and sisters, I am doing battle with a blasphemous daughter of Gangleslotte!Pray to our beloved Lord Farblesnozz, that I might help to turn her from her villainous ways, and bring her back to the path of righteousness!
There are those of you who hate me for my dedication to Farblesnozz, our one true Creator.Some of you have even gone so far as to say hateful things like, "Farblesnozz doesn't exist," "You are an idiot," or "Sir, this is a Wendy's." But I care not. For when I am faced with such hatred and lies, it can only mean that I am telling the... See More » (1)
Why do unbelievers claim without evidence that Farblesnozz is a lie?The Holy and Perfect Gliberoo is all the proof needed to show that He is real!
Ye blasphemers who insist that Farblesnozz is nonsense, WHERE IS YOUR PROOF!?Lacisnesnon 1:1-5 1. Ye workers of iniquity, who claim that there is no Farblesnozz, where is your proof? 2. It cannot be the air, for he hath created it! 3. It cannot be the dirt, before he hath created it! 4. It cannot be the trees, for they... See More »
Tratskoob 1:1-2:51. When Farblesnozz began to create the universe, all was chaos. 2. And Farblesnozz spake, saying, "Let the chaos order itself!" 3. And the universe compressed into a single point, hot and bright, 4. then did burst outward in every direction. 5. And... See More »
Ymehpsalb 1:1-81. Now Gangleslotte was jealous of Farblesnozz, for His creations adored Him. And so he disguised himself in white robe and beard, and deceived the people, saying, 2. "Behold! I am Yahweh, your creator! Abandon this worship of Farblesnozz and follow... See More »
Tihsllub 1:1-21. And Farblesnozz spake unto the people, saying, "Transcribe My words, and hold them sacred and true, for they are perfect and holy. 2. And you shall call the book which you will write the Holy And Perfect Gliberoo, for it is My perfect message."
Gargletwatch 4:17-2117. Pay no attention to false prophets and false gods, for they are the minions of Mayor Gangleslotte. 18. The Holy and Perfect Gliberoo is the only true record of our Lord. 19. He who follows religions not of Farblesnozz will be cast into... See More »