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I Want to Pee Myself In the Cinema
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Try this, a little guide to cinema peeing

As someone who always wets myself when I go to the cinema I can probably help you. Here are a few pointers.

1. Go to the last house. If you are worried that your pee might offend someone, going to the last house means that it will all be soaked away and no one will know it is there by the time the auditorium starts to fill again.

2. Go at the end of a run of the film. It won't be crowded so you will be able to find a quiet place to sit.

3. Dress to wet. Wear clothes that will not show that you have wet yourself. This is easier for girls, I wear a black skirt, fishnet stockings, and open heels, but guys should be OK wearing spandex trousers, cycling shorts, or something similar. Take a big coat with you if you are worried.

4. Drink a lot. Drink plenty before you go (I normally have a pint of tea and a litre of orange juice, but whatever keeps you hydrated is cool. It can be hard to drink that much plain water!) Take in plenty of drink to keep you hydrated. You will be peeing, so you will need to top up. The biggest cola is usually best.

5. When you get to the cinema make yourself comfortable in the seat. I smooth my skirt under me, it is nice to know it is going to get a good soaking soon.

6. As soon as the lights go down it is time to pee. Just a short spurt at first, about fifteen seconds is about right for the first spurt, you just need to do enough to wet your clothes and the seat a bit and let it soak in. Don't wait until you are desperate, do this as soon as the lights go down. If you are desperate it will be hard to stop!

7. Wait a few minutes and you can pee again. This time just relax and pee full blast until you are empty. You have already wet your clothes and primed the seat so your pee will soak away nicely now and not run off. Enjoy the building warmth, and the overwhelming sense of freedom to just pee where you are sitting while enjoying the film.

8. Drink. Keep drinking to replace what you have peed.

9. As soon as you feel a tingle in your bladder pee again, and pee until you are empty.

10. Keep drinking and peeing until about fifteen minutes before the film ends. Now is the time to squeeze out the last of your pee and let it soak away. By the time you leave there should be no tide mark, although your clothes will be very wet with pee still.

11. As you leave remember to tip up the seat. The weight of pee in the seat will prevent it from self righting, so you will have to give it a hand. Wait until everyone has gone as you don't want anyone accidently touching your wet bottom in the jostle to get out!

Well, that is how I enjoy every visit to the cinema. I am sure that you will too.
Oldest First | Newest First | Top
meJess · F
Maybe this lockdown wasn’t such a bad idea after all
morvoren · F
You’re really not okay, are you?
Paulypeeps · 46-50, F
[@981722,morvoren] I'm fine. Just trying to help.

 
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