I Love Tattoos

It is like an addiction for me. My skin is inked in all sorts of places. Some hidden from view, others out on display. I have noticed over the years, I go to visit my tattooist when I am feeling quite low. Almost numb. He has no idea, or maybe he does, as he always says to me as I walk out the door – big smile on his face, see you next time. I like to go because the pain of the vibrating needle going into my skin helps me to feel whole again. I am craving the release of endorphins I get when being tattooed. The repeated burn and sting on my body, turns to a heady feeling with a strange intensity which relaxes me, and brings me back to life again. An intoxicating rush. Like a map on my body, the ink reminds me of a roadblock in my life that I made it past. I have a whole collection of tattoo ideas, to guard against making a poor choice while low, and my tattoo artist is always good at working with me to ensure I don’t end up with something I will regret. My long-suffering husband now just goes with it, when he comes home from being away at work he will notice something new on me. He just hugs me, smiles and unpacks his bags. He has plenty of tattoos himself, but he has no interest in more. Lately it has been only a matter of weeks between sessions, and I am looking to go again. My life is taking on a whole new dimension as I change careers, and this year is going to look and feel very different, maybe this change will help me to feel less lost and more in control. And no more tattoos.