I Am A Christian But Im Not Perfect
Why I was so angry with God....Because He inspired movies about my world, taking everything into account all that I seen, all of my dreams, things I've said, where my heart was, everything....I see myself and my family in every character, I see the people around me in these movies....I see them sinning, I see them dying, and dread them ever seeing my world for fear that it would hurt their feelings, and they would get mad at me. Thus condemn me, and all hell would break loose! It's traumatizing! I lose the people I care about the most. It just sucks. And it won't end until the day I die, it follows me, and people come and go based on what they see on the TV, not based on my own actions. So I was angry with God for the last few years, I fought with him over the loss of my old family doctor, for turning him against me, for revealing to him my fantasies about him, everything I do in the dark, comes to light for all to see, and it's hard, I wanted to be in the light, but I am a sinner none the less, I can't help not to sin, I enjoy sinning, but fear the consequences so go and sin no more is my motto, but it isn't easy.
I want to learn how not to fall when they cast stones at me that's my number one goal, to not succumb to worldly sorrow cause I know it's garbage, I know it doesn't know you, but what if.....What if it does? What if those are your sins and not mine!? And you cast stones at me???? For fear that we've been exposed?! GOD CANNOT LIE! I know that all of the sins in the world are not my own, I didn't die for the sins of the world, Jesus did! Sigh! So why are we fighting? Why don't we see greatness withing eachother, why can't we see His reflection in the world? It is up to us to fight for a better world, and keep on fighting for a better world, ALL OF US not just me! So stop oppressing me brother! IT's not Gods fault that we are all sinners, even our righteousness is like that of thilthy rags sometimes, but GOD never intended to condemn me but to save me, and all that he's done for me out weighs all of the bad I've had to endure, even the abuse and loss. Lord, I still love you, I'm sorry for being angry with you for all of these years, I just feared that my worlds would hurt people because of me, but it's not just me it's all of us and I see that now. I know that we are all one in your sight, but I am not guilty of their sins, and we only see in part until its fullness comes to pass. You are saving us from our sins all of us! So I will do whatever you require of me, be it I win or lose friends, I will love them all, but most of all I will be in LOVE WITH YOU! For YOU are my treasure, you are my reward. Nothing in this world compares to the glory I find in you. So please forgive me, have mercy on me for being distant and angry and short sighted, I just didn't understand.
I want to learn how not to fall when they cast stones at me that's my number one goal, to not succumb to worldly sorrow cause I know it's garbage, I know it doesn't know you, but what if.....What if it does? What if those are your sins and not mine!? And you cast stones at me???? For fear that we've been exposed?! GOD CANNOT LIE! I know that all of the sins in the world are not my own, I didn't die for the sins of the world, Jesus did! Sigh! So why are we fighting? Why don't we see greatness withing eachother, why can't we see His reflection in the world? It is up to us to fight for a better world, and keep on fighting for a better world, ALL OF US not just me! So stop oppressing me brother! IT's not Gods fault that we are all sinners, even our righteousness is like that of thilthy rags sometimes, but GOD never intended to condemn me but to save me, and all that he's done for me out weighs all of the bad I've had to endure, even the abuse and loss. Lord, I still love you, I'm sorry for being angry with you for all of these years, I just feared that my worlds would hurt people because of me, but it's not just me it's all of us and I see that now. I know that we are all one in your sight, but I am not guilty of their sins, and we only see in part until its fullness comes to pass. You are saving us from our sins all of us! So I will do whatever you require of me, be it I win or lose friends, I will love them all, but most of all I will be in LOVE WITH YOU! For YOU are my treasure, you are my reward. Nothing in this world compares to the glory I find in you. So please forgive me, have mercy on me for being distant and angry and short sighted, I just didn't understand.
