I Believe Smiling At Somebody Can Change Their Day

@sceadug: First off, you're not the only person to ever struggle with that. And that puts you in a really hard place. You smile at a woman in hope of receiving a positive response, which will help build your confidence, yet the confidence is part of what's going to help you get that positive response. It's a catch-22 and it stinks.

There are a lot of different ways you can start to work with this, but all of them involve taking on some kind of stretch goal to help you increase your confidence and self-esteem. The better you feel about yourself in general, the easier it will be to smile at a woman with confidence. One approach might be asking someone for an honest evaluation of how you come across if you trust them to be both kind AND honest - that's important. Another might be taking on some kind of stretch goal - maybe train for a marathon, maybe get a promotion at work - you would best know what kind of stretch goal you would be willing to commit to. If you can afford it, maybe even ask a life coach or counselor for help.

I can tell you that women are drawn to men who care about others, and typically men who feel good about themselves are best able to do that. If you're insecure now (and most of us are in one way or another), being in a relationship will tend to amplify that. How we deal with that insecurity will have everything in the world to do with how successful we are at relationships.

I know inside you there is a really great guy. But I think he may need a little help to put his best foot forward. 🙂

@sceadug: Set some [i]concrete[/i] goals - ones where you can name what you want to accomplish, you'll know when you've reached it, are realistically achievable, and that have a specific deadline. Taking action will help you build that confidence. And don't be afraid to ask for help. I don't know anyone who gets somewhere in this life without help along the way. :) We're not all good at everything - that's why we need others. :)

@Sceadug: If you know any women who you trust to be both kind and honest, you might ask them for their opinion on how you're coming off when you smile. The smile is a start, but there's a confidence that goes with it that is also appealing to women, and if your confidence is lacking, that might be why you're getting the response you are.

Would it be accurate to say that you struggle to feel confident?

@topsy: Amen, sister! 😄

as long as you don't get reported to authorities for harrassment, there's always hope 😁

@Kerennya Thanks for the support. As far as I can tell, I don't feel as insecure as I do just generally suffer from low self esteem, you know? I am working on my confidence though, little by very little step

A simple smile without any sort of "Joker-esque" look seems to make them avoid me :(

@Kerennya Yeah, that's fairly accurate