I Am Heartbroken And Hurt

It has been almost three years. I know I was so stupid to even fall for him. I fell for him when we were both too young and I had never had the intentions of dating before graduating university. He was just my classmate. We may have been close friends for a period of time. However, I was ignorant enough to be clingy around him and that granted me the end of our close friendship. My own actions brought the consequences that crushed my heart and soul. It was utterly my fault.

Four months ago, I moved to a new city. I started my new life from then. I am attending a new school and joining a new community. Despite the fact I never attempted to confess to him my feelings, let alone reaching out to him on purpose, I wrote an email to him recently. It was sweet and brought back great memories when we were both so close. We talked and talked. In the conversation, he pointed out how I seemed to be happier in this new environment. It broke my heart and I was screaming no in silence. It was dreadful waking up knowing i wont encounter him anymore in school. That someday he would bond with someone else. That he will forget me. I kept thinking, 'Im not happy here. I am not happy without you. Please dont give up on me. Please don't think that you are nothing to me.' I didn't say a word about that and all i said was how i wont totally agree with that statement. I made a fool out of my self.

I still miss him every day now. But how much i wish for him wouldnt matter for him. All i can do is to wait him to enter my dream...