I Have A Dark Side Of Me That I Keep Hidden

I have split myself into when I was little my happy, positive supportive side I even gave him a name it was Chad i believed he was a real person in my head and my dark side which is me insecure, scared, lonely. I switch between the two, when I'm feeling depressed Chad will take over and make sure I feel happy by telling me jokes, it feels so real but I know it's in my head, I made him so long ago he feels like a different person, in the middle of class, I'll be having a conversation in my head with him, sometimes I'll get frustrated and I'll yell at him, he'll get quite and I'll get scared he'd leave, sometimes I have dreams about him where we're in a place that we made together, a safe haven, where we talk about how u need to just be happy and stop being scared then I wake up and deal with life but I'm always reassured that I'll be fine by him, over the years I've began to fall in love with him, I told him one night and he just smile and told me he knew and that that was the first step to loving myself he told me one day he would have to leave because I would no longer need him, when he told me this I woke up crying, who wouldn't, if be loosing my best friend the only person I learned to love, the next week he told me that he was just filling the space for my soul mate that made me smile, he was always good at that, one day he just stopped talking now I'm alone but it's not so bad because I have memories and the land we built together will exist in my mind, he helped me love myself but I wish he didn't leave