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Life is painful in a strange way sometimes. I've found that I've experienced many things I wanted to experience. But not the specific way I wanted to.
So there's a giant hole left in my heart.

I'm sad yet I'm happy.
I'm happy yet I'm sad.
I'd like to feel complete.

I've gotten better and have improved in a lot of ways but realizing this is frustrating.

I'm soul searching, looking for answers and seeking others advice and wisdom.

If you'd like to share your own experiences or perspectives on the matter feel free to do so. Hope you're all doing well.
Silentspectator · 41-45, F
Life hardly happens the way one intends.
Continue walking ahead and feel free to keep your mind open when see travellers on the way. Judging kills the otherwise ongoing process of learning life better from all perspectives.
AuRevoir · 31-35, M
[@24735,Silentspectator] If only I hadn't been judging for 10 years beforehand. I know what you mean.
Silentspectator · 41-45, F
[@410477,TenmaTsukamoto] better late than never.
StarLily · 46-50, F
I realize I am my soul... now I'm just trying to understand it better. I've been blessed with things I didn't think I'd ever have, but the outcomes were not what I expected. Releasing expectations is a key I think. I understand what you mean by being sad, yet happy.
Serenade · F
My biggest lessons came from the worst traumas and pains. I don’t know how to fix the aftermath but I do my best to learn from them and to heal.
I am a much older soul than I was even three years ago.
AuRevoir · 31-35, M
[@1073060,Thoughtful] I feel you on that... The aftermath is what's hurting me the most.
Serenade · F
[@410477,TenmaTsukamoto] I understand. Im a shipwreck .
AuRevoir · 31-35, M
[@1073060,Thoughtful] We're drifting out hoping for a shore to land on, circling in all this fog..
thewearypanda · 31-35
I have wrestled with this since I've been disabled. I'm so proud of my siblings and everything they've accomplished, the people they've grown into, etc., but it also rips into my soul because I haven't. I'm almost 32, and I'm still jobless, degree-less, whatever. Life just got in the way, and has continued to... and I've gotten in my own way more than once.

The universe doesn't have any sympathy for our tiny tragedies, it would seem.
AuRevoir · 31-35, M
[@1218,thehopefulpanda] If I get to the point of being able to help more, it's stories like yours that make me want to reach out as much as possible.
sighmeupforthat · 41-45, M
yeh, hey, i'm a widower now so... i gotcha!

life eh? i wonder if life is empathic or just a practical jokester?
AuRevoir · 31-35, M
[@341171,sighmeupforthat] it's probably a dinosaur. A big scary dinosaur.
sighmeupforthat · 41-45, M
[@410477,TenmaTsukamoto] or a cow that gives zima instead of milk... chocolate milk!
AuRevoir · 31-35, M
[@341171,sighmeupforthat] It's probably Santa and that's why he needs a list full of Good and Bad people.

So when he effs shit up he makes it up to some of the good ones on Christmas.
You could have written this for me also, except the soul searching part. I don’t do that anymore. I spent decades soul searching, and never got anywhere. Now, I just accept, and have a good old venting session now and again.

I wish you well on this arduous journey, called life. 🙏
AuRevoir · 31-35, M
[@40142,Carissimi] Thank you!

 
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