I'm learning how to give up on things that no longer serve me

This church group I'm in makes me upset and does not meet my needs.

I've never been happy with any job I've had. I've always stayed at them too long, causing SO much stress, and anxiety.

My immediate family (mom, dad, siblings) are fake and 90% of our gatherings seem inauthentic. Actions speak a lot louder than words.

I'm no longer going to ignore my feelings.
I'm no longer going to persevere through a job that leaves me feeling drained and terrible about the job and myself because how I'm treated.

Hate that I have no one to turn to but, I'll survive

This page is a permanent link to the reply below and its nested replies. See all post replies »

Musicman · 61-69, M

How are your parents fake? Is there anywhere you have ever been happy?

iamnikki · 31-35, F

@Musicman I don't think I've really ever been happy.
I try to go somewhere every weekend. Sometimes I send my parents photos of events that I attend, since I am the only one of their children who lives alone...just so they have an update of my life if that makes sense. Sometimes my dad will say " you could have went to XYZ place on the weekend and I would have come". (he said that last week) So, this past Thursday, i stated I was going to XYZ festival on the weekend, FREE event. He said "maybe". The day of came, and he said absolutely nothing. I sent photos of the event. Again, he said absolutely nothing in response.

This happens all the time. He acts jealous when me and my mom board a plane and go somewhere, yet when he is asked to go somewhere it's always "maybe, I'll see, I don't know right now".

Mom flip flops, you can't tell her how you feel without her getting mad. She says she loves you but will go weeks without talking to you, after you've told her how you feel about something.

FAKE FAKE FAKE

Musicman · 61-69, M

@iamnikki I am so sorry to hear this. 😢😢😢