Struggles & Identity > Mental Issues

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My Dad is in the hospital

He fell and has broken ribs and shoulder.
He is also massively confused and we have signed the DNR.

I feel so lost

Send good thoughts x

#mydadhasdementiaandimlosingmymind

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Ontheroad · M

I hate dementia and what it does to people and their loved ones... I'm sorry you are having to go through this, but you did the right thing by getting a DNR in place.

Sending positive thoughts your way.

DrWatson · 70-79, M

I am very sorry. It is amazing how something so life changing can happen in a flash.

I can only imagine how you are feeling now.

But if the thought of losing your dad makes you feel lost, that suggests you had something that many people do not have -- a good relationship with your dad.

I hope that in time, the cherished memories you have will be a source of comfort.

Piper · 61-69, F

I'm so sorry. 😞🙏🏼

I have imagined how heartbreaking it has to be, having a parent with dementia. I know that lost feeling, and my heart goes out to you.

WelshLovely · 46-50, F

I'm so sorry to hear this, lovely. My Dad had vascular dementia and it's so hard to go through. If ever you need an ear from someone who understands, you know where I am x

View 4 more replies »

InOtterWords · F

@WelshLovely your compassion and good thoughts are plenty x

WelshLovely · 46-50, F

@InOtterWords You've probably already tried this, but is there a type of music that he likes? We found that playing music/reading to my Dad sometimes settled him when nothing else would x

InOtterWords · F

@WelshLovely i would do but he is in a ward with 4 others

Zeusdelight · 61-69, M

I am so sorry to hear.

My Mum had dementia and a fall near the end.

It is such a confusing time.

InOtterWords · F

@Zeusdelight i'm so sorry. It is so hard to see him like this

Zeusdelight · 61-69, M

@InOtterWords Yes, it is very difficult. Powerless and seeing someone you love like that.

Harmonium1923 · 51-55, M

I am so sorry to hear it. Sending thoughts of love and peace to you and your family.
💙💙💙

ineedadrink · 51-55, M

It is such a horrible situation. Hang in there and remember to take care of yourself, too.

robingoodfellow · M

Dementia is so cruel. You're whole life is about gathering memories and growing as a person. Then dementia comes in at last years of life and rips it all away. It's heartbreaking to watch and exhausting to deal with.

pillowprincess · F

Omg. I'm so sorry to hear the bad news. Sending you my deepest thoughts and wishes to you, your dad, and your loved ones. 💜

InOtterWords · F

@pillowprincess thank you

Classified · M

Oh no, that's so horrible. 🥺
Hopefully they can help him well in the hospital.

Convivial · 26-30, F

I'm sorry to hear that... Hopefully he will pull through this

Musicman · 61-69, M

Wishing you all the best. I will pray for a full and speedy recovery 🙏🙏🙏

Beatbox34 · 31-35, M

I'm sorry. I'll pray that this tough time passes and he pulls through.

Bexsy

My positive thoughts for you and your family

Plasticbag · 100+, M

My thoughts are with you all xx

InOtterWords · F

@Plasticbag 💕

Straylight · 31-35, F

I’m so sorry. I hope he recovers quickly.

ayeletchen · 22-25, F

why would you sign the DNR? don't you want your dad to live?

View 6 more replies »

DS1980 · 41-45, M

@ayeletchen Seriously? If you have been through similar, then that is awful, but please don't be rude to someone in pain.

InOtterWords · F

@DS1980 she is now blocked x

DS1980 · 41-45, M

@InOtterWords Deserved too. Hate solves nothing xx

JRVanguard · 26-30, M

Sending hugs and love to you and your loved ones 💛💚

OliRos · 18-21, F

🤗 I am sorry to hear your news. It is a hard time for you. 🕯🙏🕯

sam1992 · 31-35, M

I hope your father gets well soon ☹️

This comment is hidden. Show Comment

blackarcher256 · 61-69, M

Sending good thoughts.

MyMonstersAreReal

Im so sorry :(

mindstruggle

I’m so sorry. 😔

Captainjackass · 31-35, M

Sorry 😞

DS1980 · 41-45, M

🤍

KunsanVeteran · 61-69, M

My prayers and many, many others going your way this morning

InOtterWords · F

@KunsanVeteran thank you

Colonelmustardseed · 36-40

Oh no. I hope he’ll be okay. What a scary situation. 😔

Burnley123 · 41-45, M

So sorry.

pdockal · 56-60, M

HUGS

bijouxbroussard · F

I’m so sorry, my friend. 🫂

basilfawlty89 · 31-35, M

I'm so sorry to hear this.
Sending positive thoughts and vibes to you and your loved ones.

V00doo

All the love and hugs to you all ❤️❤️

InOtterWords · F

🩷💕💜

SandWitch · 26-30, F

I have witnessed several times what you're going through right now with your dad. The very first time for me is what I've always labeled as the 'darkest period' in my life. But then when I witnessed repeated identical situations that followed involving people outside my own family, it suddenly occurred to me that there is some kind of order of purpose behind what seems to be a tragedy in the family.

What I've come to learn is that often a tragedy is mislabeled and turns out to be a blessing in disguise for all concerned, even when it involves our own loved ones. It took me a very long time to come to that place in my mind, but I finally get it now.

The greatest challenge I've ever faced was the day I was backed into a corner by truth itself and it was that same truth that forced me to sign that DNR Order against what I use to call my 'better judgement'.

View 3 more replies »

SandWitch · 26-30, F

@blackarcher256
Oh wait! You never offended me! English is not my first language and I only came to SW in the first place to practice my English writing skills. What I wrote to you didn't sound correctly worded to me before I posted it and your response confirms my own suspicions.

What I meant to say was, I have learned a lot about the various types of dementia that are out there and if there is anything about your father's disease that you question as it pertains to the effects of dementia, perhaps I can tell you what I've learned myself.

Sorry for the misunderstanding!

blackarcher256 · 61-69, M

@SandWitch No worrries, sorry I misunderstood your post.

Sadly my father passed about 15 years ago. Since it could possibly be hereditary, and it scares me that I could possibly suffer the same fate, I’ve done a lot of research on the subject. But if I have questions, I’ll certainly contact you.

SandWitch · 26-30, F

@blackarcher256
The good news is, Alzheimers dementia cannot be genetically inherited if a person is over 60 years of age and has experienced no symptoms of dementia up to that point. In other words, if you can make it to 60, there is no chance that you'll possess the rare type of Alzheimer's gene that only affects those under the age of 60. This means that Alzheimers is not a genetic issue of itself, assuming that rare anomaly affecting those under 60 is not an issue either.

Vascular dementia cannot at all be genetically inherited from relatives. There is no genetic link between family members. Vascular dementia is caused by high blood pressure, diabetes, heart disease and stroke. Those 4 issues alone are caused from a poor or relatively unhealthy lifestyle one maintains their entire life which leads to those 4 issues over time, which then leads to vascular dementia in the end if they continue. This again is not a genetic issue but is definitely a lifestyle issue.

Hope this helps to relieve some of the fear that surrounds your family's experience with dementia. Feel free to contact me!

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