How would you feel if your therapist said this?

I was discussing dating and my intimidation with men. How I want to date but don't feel enough.. due to my issues. I liked she Said I don't need to heal all my Issues or be Perfect to date. That men will have issues too. But then She said "You have a lot of anxiety. You may always have it. It is who you are.. "
On one hand i get she meant to kind oF not be ashamed of my disorder. But on the Other hand it is not who I AM. It is a result of trauma and not truly me. I just let it go but not sure how to Feel...how might you feel?

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itsok · 31-35, F

I completely get why that would be upsetting to you.
I wonder if she meant it more like- you have anxiety now, and you need to include anxiety in your planning and goals?
Mentioning that you may always have it (I truly hope that’s not true and you get relief) just meant that making plans for when you’re “better” isn’t a good way to plan for the future, because the you now does experience anxiety.

Have you ever done any ACT therapy? I was very resistant to it when I started, because it seemed like the opposite of what I should’ve been doing, but it ended up helping me immensely

Coralmist · 41-45, F

@itsok She could have meant it that way..ty my friend. I think that could be the case for "you may always have it"..but the "Its who you are" made me feel small. What is ACT therapy?

itsok · 31-35, F

@Coralmist I’m so sorry. I don’t think it’s who you are.

Acceptance and commitment therapy. It helps you stop fighting against things that you struggle with. Not in an “I’m not going to work on this” way, but more of a “I’m going to accept that this is part of my life right now” way

Coralmist · 41-45, F

@itsok I had not heard of that..Will look into it. Thank you 🌻 Is it a special type therapist or do many know it?